Hi Guys!

I know it has been awhile.  Ok, longer than awhile.  It’s been FOREVER since I wrote a full-on blog post!

You see, I have been in this interesting place; a place where contemplation and grounding have been more important than action and output.

Many months ago, I went through an uncommon period of activity that was so intense and so demanding that something mind-boggling happened!  For a period of no less than 5 weeks I was so swept up in life that I totally and completely forgot to Make My Life.

Me, Coach Joelle, the master Life-Maker, creator of the Make Your Life Program! The person who loves nothing more than to create life and live my dreams – and I had totally disconnected from all that I value, from all that I am in the name of productivity and a mad dash to who knows where?.

Once I had woken up, things became very clear:

1) 5 weeks of unconscious living was NOT OK! In no way was this the quality of life experience that I found acceptable for myself.

2) I realized anew that if I could totally lose sight of my own creative power and my process anyone could and I had some serious work to do.

First things first -  I had to step back … WAYYYYY BACK! I looked at the myriad projects, ambitions, aspirations I had, the programs I wanted to write and the products I wanted to deliver and asked myself:

a) Why do you want to build this?

b) Is this project/action/ambition essential to your career, fulfilling you destiny, maintaining or growing your way of life?

c) Are any of these projects just “nice ideas”? If they never happened would it affect my income, my purpose, my level of joy?

d) Does all this have to be done right now?

e) What is most essential?

The things that were most important rose to the top and everything else had to wait until I had the space to invite them back in. So here is what made the top of the list other than, of course, serving my amazing clients and making my life:

Building The New Coach Joelle Inc. Business Coaching Site

One of the things I had been struggling with was that, more and more, I was reconnecting to executive coaching and serving inside of businesses but the truth was that my Coach Joelle site was never designed to do that.

I found myself writing these newsletters knowing that I had executive clients that may not want to hear about the “magic of life” or how I secretly think that I have a direct line to Arianna, Queen of the Forest (ya, I know – I’m not kidding.)

It became really clear that, in order to have full self- expression in all areas on my life and to be able to contribute what I was here to contribute, it was time to break out my business into two communities:

1) My executive business community -  whom I serve through business coaching and the iLead Self- Mastery Program and

2) The LifeMakers – those who want to join me in the dance of consciously creating their life through the Make Your Life program and life coaching.

We are still a couple months out but I wanted to share with you the beginnings of what is sure to be a kick butt business coaching site!!  I am so proud of this – it is beautiful and empowering and it is going to totally take my executive coaching to the next level.

 Here is a sneak peak:

Coming soon! I will let you know when it launches!

Recreating The Make Your Life Program

The other essential undertaking was to recreate the Make Your Life Program, integrating all of the new clarity and awareness that had arisen over the years since I first conceived of it.  As far as I can tell, my job in this life is to raise the consciousness of the planet by seeking to understand the nature of life and share it with others.  The Make Your Life Program does that in a powerful and profound way and I am very proud of what it has become.

Over the months to come I will be sharing much of the wisdom in the Make Your Life Program in this blog and I will also give you an opportunity to join me for the next live program. But, for starters, I wanted to introduce you to the entry point of it all! The Make Your Life Quiz!

I created this quiz to help people determine:

a) Are you powerfully making your life?

b) Where are you strong in LifeMaking and where could you use more support?

c) What are the specific actions you can take to move into a more powerful place?

If you want to find out where you currently sit on the LifeMaking scale, go ahead and give it a try!

Beyond these essentials I have been taking care of my body, loving my husband and creating my life and, with these major projects coming to fruition, I am ready to get more of my energy out into the world .

So, expect to hear more from me in the months to come and if there is anything you need, if you want to connect or get talked out of a rut or off a ledge or into an adventure, don’t hesitate to reach out.

I hope you are totally loving your life and I look forward to connecting again soon.

With love,

Joelle

  Join J   7 S teps tepsTEPS TO POWERFUL LIFEMAKING TELE-SEMINAR: Join Coach Joelle on the first Wednesday of every month for this introduction to The 7 Essential Steps To LifeMaking   Learn More  

 !!!NEW!!!  MAKE YOUR LIFE PROGRAM MARCH 20 – MAY 8, 2012: Coach Joelle is Launching this  8 week intensive through the Entheos Academy For Optimum Living. Are you ready to experience the magic of your life lived on purpose?  Learn More 

  JJJMAKE YOUR LIFE PROGRAM MARCH 20 – MAY 8, 2012: Experience the Magic of Your Life Lived On Purpose in This 8-week intensive. Learn More 

Happy New Year!!

I hope your New Year is off to a totally rocking start!

Jeff and I launched the year in style at an Alter Ego Party (Best darn idea for a New Year’s Party yet!)  Drinking Kale/apple juice and eating vegetables, I went as Arianna, Queen of the forest and, as you can see, if my husband could be anyone he’d be a Northern resident Orca (A61 to be specific.) 

Sure it looks like we are having fun but beneath the flowing red locks and protruding dorsal fin you will see two people declaring their truth and living their passion. I aspire to being a vegan green juicing goddess and Jeff wants to save the whales. It was the best New Year’s Eve ever and I didn’t have a drop of alcohol.

I know you have dreams too. There are pieces of your life that itch for change, ideas that want to take form, and to support you on your journey I have a Life-Making treat to kick-off your 2012.

Last week, the Life Makers Mastermind launched with a guided visualization where our future selves showed us around the exciting new life we are about to create. It totally rocked so I had to share.

To support you in making 2012 a year to remember I have decided to share our call with you. If you are ready to DREAM BIG, set aside 15 minutes, find a quiet spot, grab a pen and paper and enjoy the journey into your inspired future!

http://www.coachjoelle.com/lifemakers_journey_to_the_future.mp3

Download Instructions: To open the file you can click directly on the link (It will take a few moments to open) or right click and “Save Target As” to save it to your computer. Enjoy!

Wishing you empowerment, clarity and BIG DREAMS for 2012!

Joelle
 

I'm Pretty Sure I Didn't Start Out Wimpy…

Jeff and I have been married almost 5 years.  When we came together it was truly an epic love story – the stars aligned and the angels sang as I was found by my perfect match.

Long before the man ever entered the picture I had a crystal clear vision of what we would be together.

I would settle for nothing less than true partnership – one where we would plan together, budget together and learn together. Together we would design our future and together we would revel in the dance of living into it.

When Jeff and I began it was all that and more. We planned, we built, we dreamed in tandem.  The world was our oyster and we were certain that together we could accomplish anything.

And then as time passed, the shiny new toy called “togetherness” lost its luster.

More and more we retreated to our separate offices to do our planning.

More and more my girlfriends knew my dreams and celebrated my goals -accomplished while my husband was relegated to the sidelines.

More and more I lived my life, wishing for better from him and for us. Once an advocate of inspiration and partnership I found myself increasingly in the roles of nag and martyr.

My disappointment grew as did my frustration and resentment.  I was waiting for my husband to come play with me and I could not understand what had gone wrong.

Start With The Man/Woman In the Mirror

But I knew one thing.

I knew that whenever things are not working the way I want, the first place to look is never over there, but always, always, always right here with the one staring back at me in the mirror.

There had to be something I was contributing here, or not contributing. Something that I was bringing to the equation that wasn’t adding up.

I looked and I wondered and I questioned until one sunny Monday afternoon something hit me like a bolt of lightning.

I had seen this pattern before in a totally different setting with a different cast of characters.

I was suddenly drawn back to around the year 2000 BC (Before Coaching),   back to when I was a manager unable to get what I needed from my team. Back to when I resented them and was frustrated with them for not doing their jobs, not being a team, not engaging with me.

It didn’t seem like it at the time but, back then, the problem was in the mirror too.

The day I owned it, took responsibility, stood up and started leading that team – truly, courageously and lovingly leading it – everything changed.

And with that…. The light bulb went on.

I realized I was being a total wimp in my marriage.

Nothing A Spine and A Monster Cookie Can’t Fix

So, the problem was not my guy. The problem was that I was not owning my power.

I was feeling sorry for myself, lamenting the things our relationship wasn’t, wishing that they would be, trying a little… but I knew that I had better in me than that.

I’m the coach for heaven’s sake! 

I’m the creator, the dreamer, the planner, the one that makes stuff happen. Heck! That’s a huge part of why he married me!

At what point I succumbed to mediocrity and resignation I am not sure but I can tell you this. I know when I got over it!

In that moment I got clear and I got brazen.

I opened up my Outlook calendar and sent my husband a "Meeting Request."

Subject: “Tonight 7- 8 pre-Chuck Friedman family meeting with wine (on the table, not from the participants) and snacks.”  (SEND)

 
(For anyone who is not a “Chuck” fan – which is probably most of you since it was almost cancelled last season -  his name is Chuck Bartowski but you can call him Charles Carmichael, super FBI agent,  and he graces our television at 8 pm. on  Mondays in one of the cheesiest, light hearted little bits of entertainment fluff around. We are addicted.)

10 minutes later I received the email notification that my meeting request was accepted!! It was on!

I excitedly pulled together the agenda, including discussion on the mission of our family meeting and the creation of a joint code of conduct.  We had time set aside to discuss topics ranging from our family budget to division of labor and reinstitution of Sunday soup and bread night.

Next it was off to the store for wine and snacks.

When Jeff arrived home the dining room was set.  The agenda sat beside a robust display of wine, meat and cheese, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups (Jeff’s favorite) and a monster cookie that comprised of 2 chocolate chip cookies with white goo in the middle and purple and orange icing fur on top with eyes.

How could he do anything but smile?

He sat down looked at the agenda and with a sparkle in his eye said “An hour? We can get this done in less than an hour. Let me start. Division of labor… I can do a lot more there.”

And with that, my heart stirred a little. It was happening, I was doing it. “WE” were back!

As the meeting proceeded there was a growing sense of excitement, anticipation for the life we were creating together and Jeff was right. We were done in 35 minutes and on the couch with Chuck in no time.  

The next morning I hit my desk, emboldened by the previous night’s success.  I sent out another meeting notice. 

Subject: “Pre-chuck Family meeting 7-8 Monday’s with wine and snacks”

Recurring: To infinity

Today the “snacks” are healthier and we are skipping the wine (since it’s a school night and all). We are creating our future together and back to behaving like newly-weds.

Where I used to say, “I have such hope for our relationship” I now see that hope realized everyday and particularly between 7 and 8 Mondays before we hang out with Chuck. And it all happened in an instant, in the moment when I reclaimed my power and took responsibility for my relationship and my life.

The moral of the story….

Just in case you were wondering, “bribe them with food” is not the moral of the story. Don’t get me wrong, it works, but that is not the point.

The point is that, when I was out of my power, I was whining, nagging, sometimes demanding to get my needs met. It was unattractive, threatening and definitely no fun.

When I reclaimed responsibility for my own life, my relationship and my ability to make a difference in my marriage, the veil of frustration was lifted. I became light, energized, confident and playful and suddenly (gasp!) my husband wanted to play!

The Invitation:

As you look around your own life, notice where you are striving, pushing, or lashing out in an attempt to get what you want.  Notice where you are disappointed or where you are waiting for someone else to make things better for you.

Perhaps you too want more for your marriage, or maybe you have a team to lead.  It may be a friend who is not meeting your expectations or even your boss.

Instead of letting frustration and resignation rule the day, instead of complaining or laying blame, take a look in the mirror and ask the person staring back the following:

• What am I bringing to the table?
• How am I contributing to this situation?
• In what ways am I giving away my power?
• If I truly have the power to make a difference, what action can I take?
• If I were 100% committed to this thing I want and willing to take responsibility for what is not working, what action could I take to make it happen?
• If I were to lighten up, what might I try differently?

Enjoy your chat with the person in the mirror and more power to both of you.

With love,

Joelle

It has been 3 weeks since I completed my integrity experiment and having found a quiet moment I thought I would take this opportunity to close the loop on my journey.

It has been a great ride, much was learned and even more was created.

Hmmm. Let’s see….

1) Happy animals: 

One area of major triumph was my integrity around only eating animals that came from free roaming farms and to not contribute to the factory farming industry.  I have been acting on this for some time now but rarely with such consistency and vigilance. 

With free range eggs as a staple and the occasional serving of grass fed beef I have found my way to a much more vegetable centered existence and there is no experience of hardship.  When I go to a restaurant I look for the black bean soup and applaud the restaurant if they have gone to the care of having free range chicken on the menu. 

By taking this on in my integrity experiment it has truly helped me turn the corner to a primarily vegetarian diet as a joyful choice without the experience of hardship or sacrifice.

2) 97.5 Degrees:

raising my body temperature was another triumph.  I had been taking my temperature in an attempt to track body temperature for fertility and all that good stuff.  My temperature hanging out in the 96’s along with an unusually low metabolism drew me to conclude that thyroid may be an issue.   I dug in, asked more questions, read more and explored and with the help of my faithful chiropractor and B12 supplements my body is living in the 97’s with regularity. YAY!

The intention and action it took to take charge of this issue and make this change came directly from my experiment and I am grateful to have this small piece of my physical puzzle in place.

3) Guess Who’s Allergic To Gluten and Casin?

Out of my increased attention to health and my quest for unanswered physical questions, my doctor encouraged me to get blood tests to determine a possible gluten or casein allergy (wheat or milk) and low and behold I am positive for both of them.  I am so excited to learn this!  While milk had been pretty much dropped because of the afore mentioned ethical issues, Wasa crackers and Ezekiel sprouted grain bread have been a staple for some time. 

As I think back I can remember countless people asking if I have a cold to which I reply “no” and shrug it off as a bad phone connection. Could it be that my body has been fighting off the affects of my food all this time? Who knows, but as I turn in my whole wheat and oatmeal for Quinoa and buckwheat I am truly excited for this step towards greater health, one that I actually saw as an ultimate goal but had not yet had the motivation to act on.  Funny how life works that way.

4) Pondering Wine and Other “Goodies”: 

You may recall that part of this process was to experiment around the place of alcohol and sugar in my life and the findings are conclusive.

They don’t fit.  Not forever, but certainly not for now.  

Right after my crash and burn post I made a new arrangement with myself, no alcohol and no sweets until I hit 139 lbs. Why this number you ask? Well, it’s the number I have in my head and it’s not far away and historically I have demonstrated that when I play with sweets and wine it just gets in the way of this health goal so I just don’t want it in my life right now. Again, I’m not saying never, but none of it has a place as a daily installment for me.

The cool thing is that again, I feel no hardship.  Instead of wine I drink 100% cranberry juice with a little stevia. It looks like the real thing and it has a depth that is actually quite satisfying. As for the sweets, I have found that 1 tbsp of coconut, 1 tsp of raw organic cocoa powder and 1 packet of stevia with a little cinnamon is totally satisfying and I rarely ever have the need to do more than one serving. It gives me the chocolaty goodness without any of the drama.

5) Happy news on the decaf front:

Ok, one more thing about health. Since I drew a line around decaf coffee (the decaffeination process can be toxic and I cannot do strong caffeine because it makes me freaky) I have revealed some helpful information in my quest for a happy cup of coffee. 

First off, the good people at www.swisswater.com responded to one of my blog posts and shared that their process which uses water for the decaffeination process instead of solvents.  After looking into it I realized that many of my favorite coffee providers were already ahead of the curve on this one, using swiss water processed coffee in their establishments allowing me to have my “coffee without compromise.” 

Before I had discovered this decaf solution I had also made a trip to whole foods for coffee alternatives and I am quite happy to report that my new favorite drink is French roast Teeccino with unsweetened almond milk.  No caffeine, alkalizing (instead of acidic – coffee is acidic) cozy comfort in cup.

6) Meditation Shmeditation:  

Spiritually, a lot has happened due to my experiment.  I set out to meditate daily which I did for the experiment but it has not stuck afterward which is interesting.  I think I would be well served by a spiritual practice guided by someone else to get this to make this process more purposeful and meaningful.

7) One Inspired Community Coming up!:

In week 3 of my experiment I had a sudden burst of inspiration that has completely enriched my life and in a very real way created structure for me to continue to live very intentionally beyond the experiment. 

Last year a coach friend of mine suggested I do Julia Cameron’s the Artist’s Way  based on some of the things I shared with her about where my head was and what I was looking for.  I wanted to explore this but when I was cast in Beachwood Community Theaters production of the princess Snow White earlier this year I realized that rehearsal would conflict with any regularly occurring evening commitment so I put off starting the group. 

Well the idea came back to me during my experiment and it caused me to act rapidly.  I sent out an email to 10 gentle souls who I thought would like share the 12 week journey with me.  I had the email crafted and sent within the day.  I had 8 yes’s and we began the following Wednesday.

Little did I know that with this email I had managed to pull together the soulful community I had been longing for since I moved to Cleveland. In this group I am “student” not “teacher” and it is an opportunity to create, to explore, to be messy and to share love.

Who knows where we will take it after the 12 weeks of the program are complete, it doesn’t matter, all I know is that a deep need has just been filled and it happened in an instant and I am overwhelmed with gratitude.

Gentle Hands: 

Early on in my experiment I was called to get into action to find holistic/energetic nourishment, education and reprieve.  I started on a quest to find a spiritual mentor or a home for the next phase of my development.

I explored energy practitioners, and naturopathic resources and while I am still looking for a guide to support the elevation of my understanding of the world, I find it intriguing that a major piece of my puzzle was here all along.  

I am happy to announce that I have found a gentle place for the replenishment of my soul in the loving hands of Debbie Craven Massage Therapist, Reiki Master, Reflexologist and wise woman extraordinaire.  The first time I met Debbie she gave Jeff and I reflexology treatments at a wellness fair.  I loved her energy and have returned to her little peaceful studio for birthdays and special occasions. 

The 30 minute drive to her studio through Ohio’s beautiful countryside was a true delight for my senses and the moment I was on her table every care in the world drifted out of my head, I found blissful Zenned-out happiness, she has a real talent.

While she did her work we discussed resources, methodology and connections for me to continue my quest for spiritual deepening and physical healing.

This wonderful experience lead me to the obvious question.  “Why on earth would I save such a gift just for birthdays and special occasions?”  Debbie and I now have a standing 90 minute monthly appointment. And I look forward to our insightful conversations, and her gentle care of my body and soul.

9) I could go on but….:

I am realizing I could write much more than I am sure anyone wants to read on all of this so I am going to wrap it up by saying that my life is rising. I can feel it.  I feel light, creative, peaceful, healthy, excited, alert and alive.

I smile as I realize that my integrity experiment has really just been an exercise in Life-Making. Sometimes I do not put enough value on the work I do in the world – I don’t take myself seriously.  The truth is that being a conscious creator in life is the key to a joyful today and a beautiful tomorrow and through my experiment I essentially put every lesson in the Make Your Life Program into high gear in my life with awesome results.

I think I will ride this wave for awhile. My head open to possibility, my heart open to god, dancing with the magic of life.

Thank you for sharing this journey with me.

With love,

Joelle

If it is your time to reclaim the joy in your life and start taking yourself and your dreams seriously, join me for the Make Your Life Program October 13-December 8, 2010.

My father was dying.

It seemed like a good enough reason to not attend.

On the surface it sounded valid enough but if I were to be honest with myself, it was an excuse. A good excuse but an excuse none the less. 

It was my last year of university and I was part of a student organization of Peer Advisors.  We counseled fellow students on everything from stress management to cross-dressing.  On St Patrick’s day you would find us handing out green “in case you get lucky” prophylactics and we were practiced in giving condom application instruction using anything from bananas to a handy little device aptly named “woody” designed for  just the occasion.

The meeting, from which I was “excusing” myself this day was not STD related, but was instead of a more serious nature. It was an opportunity for Peers to share their experiences, to report, if you will, on their volunteer Peer Placement. 

Some were placed in Job Services, others in AIDS education, and two precious souls entrusted their semester to me in the “Peer Promotions Placement”, a function I developed to express my own creative promotional ideas in service of the organization.  The two team members who joined me in my quest were talented creatives able to bring my lofty visions to pen-and-paint-on-paper reality.

Leading up to the event, my team was not oozing confidence.  They seemed confused on what to report. They looked to me for direction but I pushed back.  They’d known about the meeting for months and on some level I was annoyed with their lack of initiative.

I left them to figure it out and sent them off to the meeting without me. 

Looking back, I must have known instinctually that something was about to hit the fan but I still wasn’t quiet ready for what went down.

Some People Are Born Leaders. Apparently, I was not.

“She treats us like TRAINED MONKEYS!!!”

That’s a direct quote, conveyed to me by the Peer Coordinator in the aftermath of my missed meeting. 

This comment was but a highlight in the litany of criticism they shelled out in my absence.  I was shocked, shamed and hurt, but to their credit, to this very day I have not heard micromanagement described more colorfully.

With the school year almost over and my father’s death a throbbing daily ache it was easy to plead ignorance, avoid the whole situation and miss the lesson.  But as with all essential life lessons, this one was going to keep coming at me until I got it.

Feed back delivered:

Response: Avoidance

12 months later I found myself once again called into the office.  I was one of a dozen youth employment agents, who matched students with summer employment.

Sitting across from my boss, Doris delivered her message fast and hard without preamble.

“Joelle. EVERYONE is complaining about you. You are REALLY ABRASIVE.”

My reaction was a one two punch of defense and resentment followed by justification and a healthy dose of righteousness thrown in for good measure. 

I rationalized that “everyone” was clearly an unnecessarily dramatic overstatement and I was sure the whole thing was related to a particularly blatant display of incompetence from my fellows regarding the PROPER and AGREED UPON placement of the ever-important client file paperclip (SIDE, NOT TOP! When were they going to get that strait?!)

Feedback Delivered:

Response: Justification

Next stop,  Manpower.

It was a couple years into my employment as a branch manager and whether it was out of a desire for growth or a hunger for success, I had begun to seek out opportunities for development. 

I learned all “7 Habits”, I was quick to throw out a deserved “Whale Done!” and I rallied my team to create “Raving Fans”.

Despite all my hard work. I ended up in the office yet again! Actually, more specifically, my staff member, Anna, came to my office, and she had news to deliver. 

She was there as an ambassador of the team. She had come to tell me that they felt I was disengaged and distant and that I was not leading them.

She had me. It was true. I had been avoiding and hiding out. 

Thanks to Anna’s act of faith and courage the feedback was delivered and I got back to the business of being the leader that I was committed to being. 

Feedback Delivered:

Response:  Action

Fast forward to 2004, I was running a branch in Tempe, AZ and I was on an active quest for great leadership, effective communication and professional satisfaction.  I had received my coaching certification and every interaction with a team member, coworker or client was a place for service, an opportunity for growth and a chance to live more fully as “a fearless leader igniting the sparkle in people’s eyes.”

I was having lots of meetings in my office those days, but these meetings had a slightly different tone.

As Heather was promoted to a higher-paying position in another division she had some feedback to convey.

“I really mean it when I say that the hardest part of leaving was to know that you were not going with me. Thank you for making me feel I can reach my full potential and that I should never stop pushing myself to be the best I can be.”

Brenda had a few choice words herself as she was on her way out the door, promoted to the onsite position she had actively pursued and won.

“Joelle is by far the most personable, vivacious, understanding and knowledgeable manager. She has always made a fun work environment, she is excellent with people and has a wonderful, true caring personality.” (Take THAT Doris!)

Feedback Delivered:

Response: Do the happy dance!

Even reading this today I am a little in awe at how far I have come. 

I share this journey with you for a couple of reasons. 

1) First of all, I have always wanted to share the “trained monkeys” story, it was so absolutely brutal to receive at an already devastating time in my life but it is a part of my story and in the telling of it I cracked myself up and hopefully helped you realize that no case is hopeless. 

2) Secondly I want to demonstrate how we all start somewhere.  Whatever feedback you are getting now in your life, consider it a gift, something to help you grow. 

And remember, if you don’t get the lesson the first time, don’t worry, it will come around to hit you upside the head again sooner or later (at this point in our lives my friends and I have made it a habit to get the message when it is a tap on the shoulder instead of waiting until it is a brick flying at your head.)

3) Finally, as I look back at my personal path from controlling, abrasive and avoidant to fearless and loving leader, I see it as an example of our capacity to grow in the direction of our desires. 

I never wanted to be a jerk boss or a freakishly annoying coworker – I just didn’t know how to do any different.  The feedback received along the way gave me an awareness of how I was showing up in the world and with that awareness came the opportunity to make a new choice; a choice to adjust, to learn, to seek my inner leader, grow into a higher version of myself and reap the rewards.

The Invitation:

The idea of feedback being a gift was first presented to me by Jim W. an internal trainer at Manpower.  This one idea radically changed the exchange of information in our office and opened the door to a world of growth.

Whether it’s a direct message a la “trained monkey’s” or more subtle like the whole family secretly feeding your casserole to the dog, take a deep breath, and remember, feedback is a gift if you dare to receive and unwrap. 

May all your feedback come to you from a place of love and may you have the strength and courage to find the lesson before the bricks start flying.

XO

Joelle

HIYA! Coach Joelle here to report that last week I totally crashed and burned in my integrity experiment.

How could such a thing happen?  You ask… And to a coach?!!!
 

Well,
 

I could explain how after a glass of wine, one scoop of gelato is just not sufficient and how when your mother in law makes blueberry cobbler for brunch you eat it, lots of it.
 

I could justify how work has been so busy and exciting that there was just no time to take 15 minutes to meditate (3 days in a row.) 
 

I could tell you that when your spouse’s alarm wakes you up 2 hours early 2 days in a row it’s no wonder everything else goes to pot!
 

I could tell you that but it is all just excuses and nonsense.
 

Don’t get me wrong, I am not beating myself up or being all mean.   My 30 days of living to my highest ideals was a gift to myself after all, not a punishment.   I even called this undertaking an “experiment” with the intention that I would be learning about what it takes to be in integrity with myself. And so after finding several fascinating ways NOT to live up to my highest ideals, it is time to recommit.
 

An often quoted speech from the “Maliwada Human Development Training School”  defines integrity as:
 

“the singularity of thrust of a life committed and ordering every dimension of the self towards that commitment.”
 

“a destinal resolve – a resolve that chooses and sets your destiny and out of which your whole life is ordered.”

If I look honestly, my “destinal resolve” the last few days has been towards being caught up in the world, being a victim to my cravings, making myself sick on blueberry cobbler and living my life confused, wishy washy and a little grumpy.  Nice.
 

Good to know.  

And so, without further whining, excuses or self flagellation, I will reference my original integrity experiment commitment, for there I have written what I chose as my “singularity of thrust” for my life (or at least for these 30 days.)

Clarity

Connection to source

Health

Fearlessness

Love

Oh yah,  I like that much better.

Today I take notice and I readjust myself back on course to engage these final seven days with new clarity and renewed commitment. 

Deep breath….. own your stuff….. recommit…… do what it takes.
 

With love and renewed integrity.
 

Joelle

Well hello!

It is almost bedtime Sunday night but I needed to touch base to let you know that I will be giving a full update of my Integrity Experiment tomorrow.

It has been quite a ride, complete with a colossal crash and burn Friday that I look forward to sharing with you.

Each day I find myself a little more. 

Each day I get a little clearer about what Integrity is and what it means to live in it. 

Each day, the totally stellar ones and the really rough ones, bring with them lessons and illumination (particularly the rough ones.)

My bed calls to me longingly but I will fill you in tomorrow.

Much love and gentle compassion to you in your own walk with integrity.

Joelle

Hi guys!

I didn’t want to close out the week without an update and a little inspiration to keep you going or gently nudge you into getting started on your integrity experiment.
 

Already, worlds are changing for the better as people take on living as their highest selves.

• In Canada, a single mom followed her heart, declined a late night bootie call and learned something meaningful about her own value.

• In LA, the roads are a little safer through one woman’s commitment to only use her cell phone hands free.

• In Australia, a coach is living louder, raising his spiritual connection and walking his talk.

• And in Atlanta, a child is getting daily quality time with her mom.
 

AWESOME and wow!
 

As for me, this new level of intentional living has resulted in:

1 lb lost (never to be found again)
 

56$ saved in Starbucks decaf-soy cappuccino’s that I did not drink,
 

Mediation for more days strait than I can remember,
 

New learning that dark subject-matter in entertainment leads to darkness in the subconscious (violent movie = violent dreams. No thanks!)
 

Discovery of the importance of having 1 night a week responsibility-free (including free from making dinner or conversation) and a system to make it happen,
 

Reclamation of 2-3 extra hours of sleep nightly and progress towards being a well-rested woman,
 

Consultation with an applied kinesiology chiropractor and an energy worker to move my health forward and raised my body temperature from 96.5 to 97.5 degrees (WOO to the HOO!),
 

Compassionate, cathartic and intuitive conversation with my dear friend Jennifer which has already proved transformative,
 

Reaping the rewards in my marriage in more ways than I can count….
 

And it is only day 14!
 

With 16 more to go, will you join me? Learn more.

Whether you choose to live to your highest ideals for 1 day or all 16, the resultant intention, focus and thoughtful action will propel you forward, provide insight and guide you toward living the life you have imagined.
 

Jump on in! Read how you can get started here and be sure to keep me posted.
 

To your life!
 

Joelle

Hello!

I’ll tell you, my integrity experiment has provided some interesting insights so far. 
 

This weekend I discovered that to be my "best self" I need to sleep more, take time to do nothing, plan for alone time and probably get a second TV.

With my husband on a sailing adventure, swimming with wild dolphins in the Bahamas, it has been a perfect time for me to get in touch with what will best serve my experience of life.
 

Left to myself with all the time in the world, I flowed through my days satisfying the needs that presented themselves; from working out, eating and sleeping to movie-watching and shopping.
 

Thursday evening marked the first hours of total “Joelle Time”. I was called to 6:30 core training at the gym and then hit the mall until they kicked me out. Uninspired by the prospect of cooking, it was off to the patio at Chipotle for a delicious black bean salad and a twilight phone-chat with Jeff as he excitedly shared the events of the first day of his trip. Perfection.
 

After a couple of full days that included work, a wedding and a rocking "Bucket List" facilitation, Sunday was my next totally free day.  I started with an invigorating morning run and then retired to the couch, giddy with the prospect of total television domination! There would be no “Meet the Press” this Sunday, oh no! It was going to be all chick flicks all the time!
 

I grabbed some Teavanna “spice of life” tea with frothed almond milk, put on my sweats, hunkered down with a pillow, blanket, and a cat in my lap and went on to watch no less than 3 movies! 
 

As the hours passed one pure thought kept rising to the surface.  I was repeatedly struck by how completely and blissfully happy I was curled up on the couch, with no commitments, being entertained without a thought of productivity in my head.
 

By 6:00, replete with my movie marathon, I was moved to tidy up and make dinner (free range turkey burgers and a fresh vegetable salad made up of produce from our organic CSA.)
 

At 9:00 I went out to the deck to meditate, candles lit, aromatherapy on hand, another cat in my lap, wind in the trees and a red sky in the west. 
 

As I sat there in the flickering light I felt more connected, more happy and more grateful than I had felt in a very long time. 
 

I realized anew that the path to enlightenment or inner peace or whatever you want to call it is not necessarily found through activity, intense thought or spiritual reading.
 

This weekend illuminated for me that, much like Maslow’s Hierarchy, I need freedom of time, space to explore, and mental and physical rest to be able to fully get present, connect and engage. 
 

As you take on your Integrity Experiment, give yourself permission and space to get in touch with what will feed and nourish you, what will make you happy and what needs are begging to be met.
 

With love,

Joelle 

Well hello!

As you’ll recall, last week I defined the parameters of my highest ideals and began zealously embodying them in “The Integrity Experiment” (read all about it -you are very welcome to play along.)

As I put the finishing touches on my 30 day plan for exceptional living and got ready to execute, I wondered what joyous activity I would be inspired to undertake first?!

Would I be called to express my creativity with paint and canvas?

Was I in for a quiet afternoon with the enlightening works of Eckhart Tolle and Ken Wilbur?

Perhaps it would be meditation in the park!

In a flash of illumination I saw the path! I knew exactly what I needed to do.

Shockingly, the work to be done was not in any way related to philosophizing or pondering the wonders of the universe. (Whah?!)

Nope. My “highest-self” had much more humble plans for my first day on the job.

Get Your "Order" On

The message came loud and clear … “Don’t even think of getting all up in your “highest-self” without cleaning up your mess! “

And so, the first brilliant shining actions I took inside of my Integrity Experiment included sweeping up the cat-hair tumbleweeds that had formed on the hardwood floor (I can just hear the collective gasp!), folding and putting away the laundry, tidying the kitchen and unpacking the suitcase that had remained on the floor after my Canadian adventures.

I organized my desk, fluffed the pillows, and watched as a clean visual picture replaced the previous disorder. 

With the taming of our space, calm came over me and my mind found new focus.

More than “house work”, these tasks were sacred and necessary, clearing room for what lay ahead.

The Invitation:

Whether you subscribe to the principles of Feng Shui or think of it more as an internal checklist that will not fully relinquish your mind until the papers are filed and the plants watered; the need for order is paramount for those who are out to consciously create their lives.

No doubt as you read this, the places of disarray in your life are rearing their messy heads, poking at you and demanding your attention. 

Whether they are…

Files waiting to be purged,

Papers ready to be filed,

Carpets longing for the caress of the vacuum,

Desks to be cleared,

Closets to be organized,  

Shelves to be dusted,

Socks seeking their perfect match,

Or crowded rooms asking to be transformed into spaces for creativity, play or rest;

Whether it’s as simple as a 15 minute “tidy”,

Or as robust as a 20-DAY DE-CLUTTERING EXTRAVAGANZA!!!

You alone know what it will take to get you grounded, clear-headed, satisfied and freed-up to create.

So do your life a favor and get to it!

XO

Joelle

Sleeeep!!! I need Sleep!!

Ok that’s it.  My 7 hours of sleep are non-negotiable.  Well, actually the whole list is non-negotiable for the next 30 days but somehow I figured that losing sleep to get up for meditation was somehow a noble cause. It’s not.

I recouped today by grabbing an hour after the gym in the AM and then slept from 5-8 pm before I helped Jeff pack for his big sailing adventure with ocean conservationist Hardy Jones where they will swim with wild dolphins in the caribbean.
 

With Jeff away on a ship, while I will miss him, it will give me the freedom to 100% choose my schedule without having to consider anyone else.  I figure a week of experimenting on my own will then prepare me to have practice keeping this commitment when my sweet husband returns.
 

Sleep is going to happen.  All 7 hours of it every night.

You are welcome to ask me my sleep number anytime between July 16th and August 8th and the answer will be 7 or more.
 

Taking it on!
 

Joelle

You are welcome to join me!  Create your own integrity experiment and join me as we live to our highest ideals!
 

Hey there!

It's day four of my Integrity experiment and I’m liking what I’m seeing. 

I can already tell that my workouts are more intense and I even feel stronger and thinner (could be a head thing but I really feel it!)
 

My daily meditation, which is one of the most essential aspects of my experiment is already proving fruitful.  I have been consistent, even getting up before our already very early trips to the gym, and low and behold I am actually receiving guidance in the form of inspired action!

One of those inspired actions is to find an energy practice (spiritual practice.)  This is not the first time I have had this idea but as part of my experiment I am committing to finding a mentor in this area in the next 26 days (ohhhh, the pressure is on now!)

Below I have also included parameters around some of the more obvious pieces of my experiment.  I figured I would get them out into the world as it will support me in being accountable. If you happen to see me out and about blatantly violating any of the below in the next 30 days, you are welcome to call me on it.

So far, I haven’t been perfect, and that’s ok.

I am realizing that getting my 7 hours of sleep with a 5 am wakeup is going to take some extra figuring. And the lovely 0 calorie, no aspartame sparkling green tea from Whole Foods that Jeff discovered, while it meets my requirements,  invariably causes me to want to take a nap. That’s not going to cut it.

There are many moments of integrity to govern that are not related to any of the items listed below.  In those moments I have been checking my thinking and behavior to my original vision or asking the simple question “Is this in alignment with my highest self?”  Based on the answer I make the next choice.

One foot in front of the other I am climbing a ladder to my highest self.  It’s not all sparkle and wonder but it feels solid and true.
 

With love,

Joelle

Practices

1) SLEEP -7 hours  (usually means bed by 9 or 9:30)

2) Meditate Daily 15 – 30 minutes

3) Journal Daily (about the process)

4) Write 5 days a week (priority)

Body/Food

5) No soy (messes with hormones, GMO, bad for thyroid.

6) No caffeine (green tea ok)
 

7) No Soda/ no aspartame
 

8) Decaf – no more than once a week.   Process toxic. Not real food.
 

9) Alcohol -  Wine or hearty beer – max 3 per week max 2 per night never to experiencing physical effects.
 

10) 2 -80 cal servings sweets a week – has to be worth it – good stuff not junk – still in alignment with highest self
 

11) Only happy meat and dairy
 

12) 3 fruit min
 

13) 4 serv green veg min

Movement

1.  Cario 5X
 

2.  Core X2
 

3.  Weights X3
 
 

The Integrity Experiment: Day 1

What a huge day.  Jeff and I got up, spent 3 hours at the gym, ran errands and were off to a gathering. It’s 10:30 PM and it is the first time to myself I have had since I woke up.  It just goes to show that when it comes to living your ideals you need to put aside the time to get in touch with what those ideals are or you life will just sweep you away.  Good thing I put a chunk of time aside yesterday so that I could get a head start on my process.

As the document below revealed itself I got very clear that I need to read it at the start of every day, likely multiple times a day to keep my eye on the ball.

It feels good. As I wrote and as I read what I wrote it makes me sit a little taller, my head clears and a gentle smile comes to my face.  This is the template for a peaceful, powerful, balanced, healthy, spiritually-connected me.

Here we go.

I am writing to determine the parameters of My integrity experiment.  As I write I can feel the tension building.  It is the tension that is pulling me into my greatest self.  I feel a little nervous and excited all at the same time.  I am also really glad that I am sharing this with you as it ups the ante and makes me accountable (see step 3 from the Highest Ideals article.) 
 

In addition I will be documenting my experience daily and commit to blogging about it at least once a week (though I anticipate it will be more.)

So here is what living as my highest self looks like:

I am grounded, passionate and energized, operating from a highly present state.  Whether I am writing, coaching, hanging with friends, or sharing a meal with my husband I attend to the moment with a combination of energy, interest, and readiness or a solid and peaceful centeredness depending on what the occasion calls for.

I am interested and engaged in life.

When I do something – I do it all the way – full out.  No going to the gym and going through the motions.  If I am there I am intentional and focused. When my husband speaks I stop and listen intently.  When I write, I relish the writing and do not get called away by the siren song of “You’ve got mail”.

I live each moment in the full knowing that “I can” and I can BRILLIANTLY at that, even and especially the things that have been barriers in the past. Now is the time to move through those old beliefs with pure thought, passion, knowing and committed action.

I feel love. Love and appreciation for the people in my day whether they are friends, family, clients or strangers.  I see things to appreciate and things of interest all around me.

(As I write there is a static-y pressure around my head and a heighted feeling of alertness – I think I am onto something.)

Emotionally, I am calm. When pressure is on or I feel annoyance or frustration I notice it and dissipate it as it is not my optimal state and does not support me being who I choose to be.

Regarding my food, I choose to consume what is in alignment with clarity, connection to source and overall health. I choose at this time for there to be a place for the occasional glass of wine or a solid hearty beer.  I am not yet ready to believe that my best self would never have a glass of wine.  Exploring this will be a part of my experiment.

I move and work my body to a strong lean vessel that I am proud to wear.  I take action in my body to take it to a state of optimal health and freedom.

I take purposeful new action to raise my body temperature and metabolism for optimum health, energy, vitality and baby-making

I take bold and decisive action to bring the new iteration of the Coach Joelle Website into being through completing the copy writing, working harmoniously and purposefully with Jeff and the team and getting scintillating new pictures taken.

I meditate. Daily. I know this is key for alignment and flow. I choose it.

I am without fear. I self express lovingly and clearly.

I believe and allow.

I do it.

Life is electric. I live in and experience the energy of the world and source.

I live in the light and the love.

(Whoa! I can totally feel the power of what I have written. It rings true inside of me and I feel totally inspired.)

I’m ready.   It begins NOW.

Love it!
 

Now, it’s your turn.  What would living as your highest self look like?  Can you define it? If you define it do you dare to take it on? If you want to play go ahead and read about the Integrity Experiment and create your own 30 day journey to who you can be.  Be sure to let me know what you are up to and I will continue to keep you posted on my adventure.

Good stuff!  Good night.
 

Joelle

HI guys!

Last week was full of milestones.  Not only did I turn 38 but I also had the opportunity to complete two decades as a full-on contributing “adult” by attending my 20 year high school reunion. 

Facing the people from high school was in many ways a last frontier for me.  I think I turned out pretty well and at some point it seemed important that those people who knew me back then get to see who I had become.

How refreshing to find that when the moment of truth came I realized that I had nothing to prove.

I enjoyed people and we shared our stories but I did not feel the need to be witty, interesting, or the life of the party.

There were no airs to put on and no one to impress.  When I was tired I left early for bed (YUM!) and when I needed solitude I did not hesitate to leave the fray for the comfort of a book (DOUBLE YUM!)

The young woman who was once so desperate for attention and approval is no more.  In her place stands a person I could not have imagined back in 1990. 
With external standards no longer binding me, the only standard that matters is my own and of course those standards will determine the height, depth and quality of my life.

And so, for my 38th birthday I am giving myself 30 days of living to my highest ideals. I will live it, document it and at the end of 30 days see where it takes me. 

Will I feel more enlightened? Vibrant? Accomplished?

Will my marriage reach new levels of bliss?

Will I lose that last 5 lbs?

Who knows? But what I do know is that I am going hard core for 30 days and then and only then can I make a new choice.

Care to join me?

This week’s article guides you through the process of identifying, choosing, and sticking to your own highest ideals through something I am calling The Integrity Experiment.

Enjoy!

Joelle

“When you reach for the stars you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.” Leo Burnett

Living to your highest ideals: The Integrity Experiment

What would your life be like if you spent it living up to your highest ideals?

What would become possible?

What are those ideals?

Perhaps you aspire to living with compassion or acting courageously.  Maybe your best self would go heavy on the greens and give up the caffeine.  Do you aspire to becoming a non-smoker or making yourself available for quality time with your children?

When I think about living to my ideals it means living into and acting in accordance with the highest version of myself; physically, spiritually, mentally, relationally and professionally and reaping the rewards in my life. 

What’s not to love about that?!

Why would we do anything else?

Hmmmm … How about comfort, laziness, fear, discouragement, being too busy and lots of other really great reasons with which we are all too familiar.

Let’s face it, sometimes that chocolate bar looks so goooood and sometimes that extra couple hours of sleep is so much more appealing that heading off to the gym in the dark.  Can you relate?

Often our reasons for not being our best selves are disguised as the “noble option”.  We skip lunch to meet with that new client or stay up extra late to deal with things that seem pressing and urgent.

Whatever our excuses, no matter how valid, every time we consciously or unconsciously choose to violate our own standards we are making a statement to ourselves and the world about our priorities. 

Would it surprise you to recognize that you have made work a priority over your family or smoking a priority over your living a long healthy life? What if I pointed out that your desire for that fabulous new blouse or your daily $4 latte wins priority over financial stability or the ability to retire?

When we get down to it, every time we act out of alignment with our standards we are in effect telling ourselves it is ok to go half way. It is ok to not go after what I want fully. It is ok to wimp out on myself and follow my values only part of the time.

Every time we lie to ourselves and every time we bend our own rules we whittle down a little piece of our strength and our faith in our own ability. We weaken our word and in doing so we are creating a watered down version of what our life could be and pushing out the arrival date of our visions and dreams.

Ouch.

So that’s the downside of not living up to our ideals but the good news is, the upside of being our best self is nothing short of miraculous.

The world lines up at your door when you line yourself up with what is right and true for you.( Note, I said right and true for YOU, not for anyone else – the only standards to consider here are your own.)

In the coaching world we call this alignment “integrity”.

When you operate with integrity, life works, serendipities abound and you achieve a new level of freedom and flow.

For my birthday I am saying Sign Me Up for more of that!  And that is why I am giving myself the exceptional gift of consciously living to my highest ideals for the next 30 days, even when it is uncomfortable, unpopular and annoying.

I will be documenting my experiences, how it feels to live this life and whether it makes the difference I imagine or not.

I won’t kid you, this may not pretty.  In fact, I am already a little terrified of putting it all on the line for 30 days but I know that a great prize waits on the other side of my resistance.

I am calling it The Integrity Experiment and you can play too.

The invitation:

Join me in your own integrity experiment. 

1. Define Your Ideals

Set aside 30 minutes today to write about your highest ideals. 

What do you value? What would raise your quality of life? What are the things you know you need to make time for but have not?

What are the thoughts you want to nurture and practice on a daily basis?

What version of you do you want to be?

What are the things that you know you have been doing part way?  What would “all the way” look like?

What are the things that have been hanging around, dragging you down and limiting your life that you would like to clean up?

2. Make a commitment

It’s one thing to write it all down but another thing entirely to commit.

Take a look at what you wrote and see if you are ready to take on the whole enchilada or a part of it.

Give yourself a timeframe. Will your integrity experiment be for a day, a week, a month, six months?  Whatever you commit to, do it fully and honestly.

Don’t set yourself up for failure with unrealistic expectations but be sure to take on the things that are really important for you, that are worthy of your time and that will raise you in your own estimation of yourself.

3. Create a system of accountability. 

DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DO THIS ALONE.  Seriously, left to ourselves it is way too easy to try it for a day or two and give up on ourselves. By sharing your commitment with someone else you are building in an essential support system for your integrity experiment.

If you have a spouse or partner, ask them to hold you accountable. If you have a blog, say you are going to blog about it and then blog about it. If you have a friend who will share your journey, invite them to make their own commitment and give each other permission to challenge and support.

4. Plan it out

Be sure to take the time to plan where necessary to support your success.

Some things you commit to may require a reshuffling of your schedule –  like daily meditation – you already have a full and busy life so where do you fit that extra 30 minutes?

Others may require a prolonged process  and would be served by an action plan -like a comprehensive smoking cessation plan or a plan to grow your capacity for optimism over time.

5. Record Your Experience

Every day, possibly multiple times a day, record what you are experiencing.

Celebrate where you have made choices in alignment with your ideals, notice where have you given in or gone half way or where you outright chose to break your commitment.  All is valuable in your process. 

Notice where your current life circumstances and present choices stand in the way of you operating in integrity with your commitment and then without making yourself wrong, or beating yourself up, ask how you can adjust, learn and move forward. 

6. Remember It’s a Process

If you think you are going to launch out the gate with a 3 page document detailing your highest self and never ever falter, you may be in for a harsh awakening. 

This is a process.  In making your commitment you will learn about what it really takes to live that commitment.  Sometimes what it takes is far more than we imagined. 

You will stumble, you will resist and sometimes your best will not be good enough.  Your setbacks are not a sign to quit – it is simply time grab on tightly to your commitment and seek out additional information, different resources or greater support. 

Whether you envision your best self as a non-smoker, a parent who is around to make a difference in the lives of your children, or someone who acts courageously in spite of fear, remember that if it is a worthy ideal for you then some way, somehow you can live it.

Use Your Coach

I encourage you to take on your own integrity experiment and if you do, let me know.  Send me an email or comment on the blog below and I will check in on you. 

Be sure to share what you are committing to, why it will matter for you, the length of your experiment (3 days, 1 week , a month?) and who in your life will be supporting you and providing accountability (besides me.)

Along the way, if you find yourself in a difficult spot or at an impasse, post a comment here and I’ll give you what I’ve got to get you back on that horse and moving forward.

You can read all about my personal 30 day declaration right here tomorrow.  (Eeek!) 

Alright! We are off to the races. 

Bring It!

Joelle

Hi Guys!

Did you know I possess an amazing superpower?!

That’s right, I, Joelle Prochera can create clouds in my living room!!!

Let me elaborate.  Have you ever had a time in life when everything just seemed a little dimmer, when the colors were less bright and life seems somehow distant and removed? 

Have you noticed how a room, any room – your office, your bedroom, your living room – can be a place of possibility, creativity and joy one day, and can transform into a dark, cold and lifeless place on another, depending on the mood or perspective we bring to the moment. 

That’s it! That’s what I’m talking about – creating clouds in your living room!

I remember the moment I realized I had this awesome power.  The insight I gained that day has deeply affected my ability to access happiness in my own life and today my intention is to share what I have learned so you can access more power over your own.

It was Arizona, in the spring of 2001.  Entering into my 3rd year in the land of perpetual sun, I had long ceased checking the weather channel.  I did not even need to open my eyes in the morning to know that the day had a 95% chance of being warm and sunny (the other 5% it was HOT and sunny.)

Despite the blaring sun and brilliant blue sky, on this day, as I sat at my dining room table, I realized that I was in a decidedly un-sunny mood.

In fact, I felt awful. Totally blah.

I am sure if anyone were to peak in on me, I must have been quite a mess.  My eyes were scrunched up and I had a sour look on my face. My shoulders were hunched over and I was a million miles from feeling even remotely motivated to do anything enlivening or productive.

This was a problem. 

I had things to do! Back then, I was a fledgling coach, thick in the middle of my education, with hours of reading and homework awaiting my focus and attention.  This was no way for a coach to feel!  I had to get it together fast!

The more I sat and stewed the more I became frustrated.  How could I be grumpy or angry or bummy? I had lives to change, for heaven sakes! It was completely unacceptable.

But I couldn’t just snap out of it.

And I became truly concerned.

How could I suddenly feel so wrong when less than 24 hours before, everything was fine.  Or at least it seemed fine.

Wait a minute!! Maybe it wasn’t fine and I just didn’t realize it!!

After all, something had to be wrong with my life, wrong with ME, that I would feel this bad and this lifeless, I reasoned.

Desperate to understand my foul mood, I began scavenging for what was amiss so I could fix it!

True, on the surface, my life looked fine.  But if I strained and focused and dug down enough, there indeed appeared to be some small cracks in my fabulous life.  Hungry for answers, I stuck my nails into those cracks and pried them wide open.

The more I scrutinized each part of my life, each piece of me, the more I realized there was actually a heck of a lot wrong! 

Clearly I was not living up to my professional potential. That must be why I feel so awful!  Ah Ha!

My boyfriend was not being as sweet as usual. Perhaps it’s time I get a new one.  I think we’re getting somewhere here!

I was living in a fabulously-decorated apartment that resembled living at a resort, but it wasn’t a house.  That was definitely wrong! Clearly, if I was good enough and successful enough, I would have bought some real estate already!  That must be it!

And don’t even get me started about the size of my…..  Bingo!

Then a moment of clarity caused an abruptly halt to my brutal assault.

Everything got really quiet as a curious thought fought its way into my awareness.

Maybe, just maybe, there was no “REAL” reason that I felt bad. 

Maybe I just felt bad because my body was having a bad day.

Maybe I was hungry or dehydrated.

Maybe I was “hormonal”.

Or maybe, as my mom would so often suggest (and I would vehemently deny) I just needed a nap.

Maybe there was nothing wrong at all and tomorrow I would wake up to a new day full of hope and possibility!

Wait a minute!

UNLESS….

What if I wake up tomorrow and I feel better physically, BUT I am left with these hard won stories of why my life sucks!

Whoa!!

Let’s just say it was one of those “ton of bricks” moments.

I realized that my ardent efforts to uncover what was really wrong with me could create a new thought, a new belief about how wrong life was, about how broken I WAS!  A belief that WOULDN’T go away with a nap or a glass of water. 

This realization, changed my life. 

It gave me new appreciation for the power of my mind and how it could be used for good or for misery.  It also gave me a new respect for the state of my very influential body.

Today, if I’m crabby, I take a nap (thanks mom.)

If I am particularly annoyed, I check the calendar to see what time of month it is. My husband has become a great help with this. Oh, and I found out “there’s an app for that”.

And when I feel sad or quiet or dark, when the clouds seem to gather in my living room, instead of attempting to justify them with elaborate tales of what might be wrong with my life….

I step out for a walk in the sun,

disperse the gloom with a call to a loving friend,

or just allow them to be, knowing that it is part of life, it is fine and it will pass.

The invitation:

The next time you feel a little lost, sad or dark, consider that perhaps there is nothing wrong.  Instead of analyzing or ruminating, try getting quiet and checking in with your body.  Ask it if there is something it needs from you.  Perhaps it needs to S   T    R    E     T    C    H.  Or maybe it’s hungry.  Or maybe it needs a nap. Or perhaps, it just needs to be grumpy for a minute or an hour or a day and maybe that is ok too.

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Signing off … It’s nap time!

With the coming of spring, I find there is part of me that warms and expands with the thawing of the earth. 

A piece of me that has been waiting quietly for the time when I can return to living with the windows open, to inhaling the subtle scents of dirt and growing things, and, like a cat in the windowsill, to laying in grassy patches, the sun warming my chilled bones.  It is a time when nature calls me to come and dance with her, and when I heed her call, my body and mind invariably are rewarded with what can be best described as a long, deep, cellular exhale. Ahhhhhhhhhhh

Today the call was loud and clear; her lure undeniable, I followed. 

I walked the 300 feet to our little patch of community wilderness (some would call it a park, but that would be a stretch.)

A mug of hot water and lemon in hand, I planted myself on top of a picnic table, unconcerned that the boards, damp from last night’s rain, would leave me a little soggy.

My plan was to meditate, eyes closed, mind open, maybe a little “OM” for good measure, but as often happens, today meditation found its own form.

Today, I sat in the tress, and grass and just ….was.

I sipped my lemon tonic and took in the world around me.

I spotted out of the corner of my eye, a robin digging up breakfast. I followed her until a cloud caught my attention.

Like Alice’s “White Rabbit” he moved across the sky rapidly, late for some important date, literally forming as he traversed the sky. 

My cloud moved on and was replaced in my awareness by a lone leaf on a maple tree cordially waving “hello”.

Racing clouds and waving trees are all fine and good but my call to nature and desire to meditate this morning were not merely born of some noble quest for enlightenment.  No, my body and mind has been stressed. I have been living with a background of anxiety for several days and I made this trip with the explicit intention to get free.

For as long as I can remember, the forest has been a welcome reprieve to the stresses of life.  As I was growing up in the Canadian north, we had a cabin on a lake. A favorite pastime was to hike to my prized discovery, an outcropping of bedrock nestled between the cottages.  Hidden on 3 sides by trees, the forth side of my little piece of paradise was lakeside property. I spent countless afternoons feeling the sun warm the rocks, listening to the loons call, dipping my feet in the numbing water and having conversations with my creator. 

You can take the girl out of the woods but it seems you can’t take the woods out of the girl, for no sooner had I gotten settled into my spot in the park this morning, I found myself recreating those connected moments at Setting Lake, asking questions of the universe,  my subconscious, and the trees.

“Ok, what’s up? Why the anxiety? What am I afraid of? How can I find peace?”   I asked.

The answer came quickly, “because you are confused. You have forgotten who you are.”

I was suspicious.  This sounded familiar, every self empowerment/path to enlightenment book on the planet was going to take me down this path. I challenged the thought, concerned my mind was playing tricks, throwing out random bits of disembodied wisdom it had saved for just such an occasion. 

Unphased by my skepticism, it continued.

“Look at the tree…the cloud…the dandelion…”

I looked, and as I looked, I saw that they were beautiful; that they were perfect; each in their own unique way.  Whether the tree was a big tree or a little one, whether the dandelion was a bright yellow sun or its frail remains, disbursed by the slightest wind or a child’s wish; they were good.

In the next moment, the question came,

“How are you different from the tree?”

“The cloud?”

“The dandelion?…”

And I saw it.  I saw truth in that moment.

I am not different.  The tree, the dandelion, the cloud, and me, we all came from the same place.  We are all built to do what is in our nature to do.  To grow, to head towards the sun, to move with the seasons and the cycles of life. 

I would never ask anything from the tree but to BE and to do what it is here to do; flower in the spring, sleep in the winter, grow with each passing year.  Why would I think there is any greater expectation of me?

And In that moment, I saw life in a way that relieved every fear, every touch of anxiety, ever bit of pressure and expectation, and left only peace and knowing.

Maybe this is what little ten year old Joey instinctually knew back on the rock at Setting Lake. Regardless, I am so grateful to know it now, if even for a fleeting moment.

You may not have grown up in the woods like I did.  You may not even be a big fan of trees and dirt and the things that come with them, and you may not be searching for the meaning of life. 

But let me tell you this.  

You are a part of nature and the natural world calls to every single cell of your being.

The world we have created allows us to live without ever stepping foot in a garden or being surrounded by silent wilderness. We have done an excellent job of separating ourselves, but along with the comforts of a warm bed and central air, we have deprived our souls of the wisdom and beauty that is nature’s alone to give.

 
The invitation:

I do not know what your brushes with nature will reveal to you but I know she holds a piece of you in her hands;  some wisdom, some peace, some beauty, something uniquely for you and the nurturing of your soul.

No matter where you live – there is nature waiting for you; in a nearby park, a walking path, a community garden or your own backyard creation. 

Do yourself a favor, go there. Be there, and let the natural world share her wonders, healing and love. 

When nature calls…. PICK UP!

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Share Yourself:   Do you have a favorite spot to go be with nature? Have you had a moment in nature that deepened your experience of life or brought you new answers and wisdom?  Tell us about it here  on the Coach Joelle Blog.
 

Are you willing to go all the way to have the life you've Imagined?

It’s an interesting question… and an important one.

Your answer will determine the heights you will reach, the goals you will accomplish and the dreams you will bring into reality.

On first glance you may think “Yes, of course! Sign me up!” But on closer inspection you begin to realize that agreeing to go “all the way” may be asking a lot from you, perhaps more than you planned. It may push you to untold limits.  It may even drastically alter your life.

With this in mind, I ask you, “ Is there something that you want for your life so much that you are willing to go all the way, even when you are not yet sure what ‘all the way’ means?  Are you willing to declare your intention, to make a commitment and create that future NO MATTER WHAT?”

Hmmm?

To be clear, I do not mean acting against your values or scratching and biting your way to the top no matter who get’s hurt – that is not the “all the way” I am talking about. I am talking about going beyond fear, beyond discomfort, beyond what you know, to have that thing, experience, or accomplishment you have imagined in your life.

As human beings, we are pretty remarkable. Almost anything we can dream up, we can create in our lives, but (and there’s a BIG BUT) it is going to take something.  Great lives do not come from sitting around and numbing to the TV, and great change does not come from being comfortable and doing what you have always done. 

You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however. ~Richard Bach

Going For It!

 Let me give you an example about an “all the way” adventure I am taking on in my own life. It started in November as a clear desire to be thin, strong and healthy. 

This is not a new desire.  My entire life, I have wanted to be a narrow person ("hipped", not "minded".)

Four years ago I found the magic bullet, a food plan that took me into high school weight territory and it was awesome! I loved the way I felt, I loved the way I looked. I was in the zone, and excited to see where my continued diligence would take me. 

And then I got complacent. 

And then I got lazy. 

And I started veering off the plan.  And over these past 4 years, I found myself a long way from the lean person I had been.

So this fall, I hired my food coach again. I pulled out my worksheets and my food log and I started back on my plan. This time, I knew it was a lifestyle, a forever thing.  I committed to getting thin and strong and healthy and staying there, WHATEVER IT TAKES!

Little did I know that it would take as much as it has.

Even with the coach and the plan, in the first months, for some reason, I toyed with the rules, grabbing a chocolate bar here and there, throwing in a little cheese for good measure.  My dalliance lead to debacle as Christmas at my mom’s place went from 1 day off plan, to, ok 2 off plan days, to, ok, this can be an off plan week! which led to numerous instances of gross culinary negligence, including but not limited to, devouring a whole box of Turtles in one sitting. Not good!

So, with the wind of a new year beneath my wings, on January 1st I decided to up the ante, to take it to the next level. It was time to go hard core! I chose to totally cut out sweets of any kind, and to take myself seriously, I promised $50 to charity for every infraction (I’m pleased to say all current donations are all voluntary and not chocolate imposed.)

Next, Jeff and I added the gym, first 4 days a week, and then 5.  This meant 5:15 am wakeup calls and an extra 1 hour of commute time.

Between “the plan”, the no sweets rule and 5 days a week at the gym, you would think I was doing pretty good.  I WISH! March 1st came and went and the scale had only moved a few measly pounds. My body was firming up so maybe the whole, “muscle weighs more than fat” ,thing was at work, but regardless, I was feeling disappointed and defeated.

Persisting Beyond Failure

That Monday, when I met with my food coach I was near tears.  “Am I ever going to get there?” I lamented.  A sadness came over me as my darkest most hidden fears revealed themselves “maybe you won’t Joelle, maybe you will always dream of the body you want and you will never actually arrive.”

This is not uncommon when we put it all on the line only to find out that our "all" doesn't cut it.  The doubt slips in and next thing you know we give up.  We resign ourselves to the life we have, instead of the one we dream of. 

It doesn’t have to be this way; even if you fall; even if what you thought was your best wasn’t good enough.  If the dream still lives in you then know that the mountain in front of you is climbable, you just may need some new equipment, an extra Sherpa or climbing lessons.

In my case I had a good coach, a supportive husband and years of witnessing myself and others persevering to achieve the improbable.  So I buckled down and asked myself, “What’s it really going to take?” and got back into action!

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

To the Next Level and BEYOND!

 Oh Boy HERE WE GO!

The next level I could see, was cutting out alcohol ( bye bye yummy red win,e SIGH.), and anything sweet, even the 0 calorie stuff (Added sweetener-even sugar free- trains the taste buds to crave sweetness, setting me up for trouble down the road.)

I found out my heart rate zones through an assessment at the gym and invested in a monitor.   I found out my resting metabolic rate ( which is ridiculously low which explains why I wasn’t seeing results when I was adding 100’s of calories of alcohol each week) and made some adjustments to my caloric intake.

This week I take the workout to 6 days a week, and I have no doubt that sometime in the next 3 months it will be time for a personal trainer.

Every day I learn more about my body, what makes it tick, how to shape it and what it will really take to get where I am going.

Persistence Pays!

I am happy to say that while I still have a way to go, my “next level” work is paying off. I’m into my skinny jeans and I am feeling stronger and healthier every day.  I am well on my way to being fabulous at 37 and gaining the habits and knowledge to be fabulous at 50, 70, 80 and beyond.

When I started this journey 5 months ago I had no idea I would be a regular at LifeTime Fitness, that I would be sipping Perrier at cocktail parties or that I would pass on birthday cake.

When I drew the line in the sand and started walking towards my goal, I had no idea it would be this challenging or that I would be making what to me, seem like extreme lifestyle choices. 

That’s the intriguing thing. When you make a commitment (I mean really MAKE A COMMITMENT) it is like getting onto a rollercoaster – you can’t jump ship when you are upside down in a loop just because it gets scary or you feel like throwing up. You ride it out to the end, knowing that it’s unlikely to kill you, and eventually you will arrive, wide eyed and grinning, shouting “What a ride!”

 I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday.  ~Author Unknown

Are you ready to go all the way?

Perhaps you can relate to my quest for health, or maybe you are growing your income, seeking your mate or following your professional dreams.  Whatever the task at hand, just remember, that while the road may be long and rocky, your perseverance and commitment can win the day.  And just when you think you have tried everything and failed, if you hold the vision, keep the faith, and stay open, there will be a next step, a new opening, and a chance for you to ask yourself  "Am I willing to go all the way?"

Follow your dreams…

Trust in your capacity to do what it takes…

Rise to the challenges (there are always challenges.)…

 And if you dare… jump on the ride and buckle yourself in. It's time to declare to the world… “I will go all the way!”

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Are you willing to draw a line in the sand and do whatever it takes to live the life you have imagined?  Share with us (below) what life dream you will commit to no matter what it takes. 

Do you have a story of perseverance in pursuit of your dream?  Inspire us with how you went all the way!

I was just writing in my diary and I thought I would share about the most interesting breakthrough that I never even realized I needed to have. 

You see, I just had the realization that I have arrived. That I have become the person I set out to be and more interestingly that somewhere along the way, I became a grown up.

Let me explain.  At every phase of my life, I have been one of the youngest people in the room.  When I became a manager at Manpower, I was one of the youngest, when I sat on boards, same thing.  When I became a coach I actually needed coaching on how to feel comparable to 50 and 60 year old peers that had been consultants since I was in diapers. 

Through mental mastery techniques I was able to gather up my courage and take on the world from a position of strength, convincing myself and those around me  that I was capable, competent and an expert in my own right.

And so I lived in a mindset where age and experience were never going to be an issue, and they weren’t.

But then,  a funny thing happened the other day.

I was out for lunch with one of my corporate buying influences, a strong and powerful woman who’s company I enjoyed.  On some level, I saw us as peers and partners but on the other, some part of me put her in a position of authority because of her role, her title and the level of responsibility she had in her organization.  

As we were dining she made some reference to her birth year being 1973, and it caught my attention. 

Suddenly I interjected:  “So, that means that you are younger than me?” I asked/affirmed with a look of curiosity on my face.

 I didn’t realize it at the time, but something started to shift in me.

Another client I had just started with in Calgary, Canada made a similar age reference the following week, and once again I was struck with the realization that she also was my junior by several years.

Flash back to December.  I was having lunch with a woman who just moved to Cleveland and had recently left a senior position at the international organization I used to work for in my 20’s.  I had invited her for lunch to make an introduction, welcome her to the city and connect. 

Near the end of the conversation she said that I represented myself very well and that she would not hesitate to take action on my behalf with people in her new company. 

And what did I do in response to this wonderful vote of confidence?

I giggled.

Seriously, I giggled!

And then I explained myself, saying that some part of me clearly had not fully owned my own power but that I really appreciated her acknowledgment.

And so, here I am at 37, having this realization that somewhere along the way I had become the expert, the mentor, the leader IN REALITY, in society and not just in my own mind. 

I am left with the crystal clarity that to make the contribution I am here to make, It is time I stepped into who I am.  No longer some idealistic youth but a grounded and authentic woman, coach and leader who is here to leave a mark on the world.

Realizing I am a grownup doesn’t make me feel any less youthful, playful or in awe of life.  It does however demand that I own the unique opportunity I have been given to make the difference that I am here to make, and it has placed a new sense of stability and self respect at the core of my being.

Life’s phases, breakthroughs and epiphanies come in the most interesting packages. Who ever thought I would be coming of age at 37.

To your power – whatever age you are.

With love,

The very grown up,

Coach Joelle

Living the adventure IN NYC

Last week I had the delight of my second trip to New York City and the city did not disappoint!

My first trip was a couple of summers ago, and to be honest, I didn’t get it.  I didn’t see what the big deal was.  My husband loves to razz me, by recounting how my assessment of New York was that “It reminds me a lot of Winnipeg, Manitoba.” It did! He still cracks himself up over that one. 

Well, let’s just say this time it only reminded me of Winnipeg a little and the rest was some cross between Vegas and Disney Land.  I had a blast!

I was in the city for a Hay House Event called “Movers and Shakers.”- I was excited to spend a weekend with 150 other speakers, authors and coaches who had dreams of touching the world and who were ready to take it to the next level.

I arrived in the city around noon and was promptly accosted by a limo driver who invited me to share a ride to my hotel with three lovely women from Prince Edward Island – a mom and her two grown daughters who were in the city for a girl’s weekend.  I loved the conversation and I gotta say I was tickled that I was in town as a “mover and shaker” and I got to ride in limo to the hotel (let me tell you, it doesn’t take much to get me excited – this made my week!)
 

I arrived at the W Hotel in Union Square and was taken by its energy and beauty.  When I walked into my room I let out a big happy sigh as I took in my lovely room, and moved in for the weekend.  Any hotel where I don’t have to call down for a robe because there’s one already hanging in the bathroom is a happy happy thing! After putting my socks in the drawer, toiletries in the bathroom and books on the nightstand I felt settled in and ready for an adventure.

I grabbed a map from the concierge and set out to take on New York! It was 2:00. I had 2.5 hours to travel the 1.6 miles to Rockefeller center for a 4:30 meeting with a client so I just started walking in that general direction.

I set out towards 5th Ave and was first taken by the quaint sitting areas created by partitioning off whole sections of road.  Little café tables with chairs and umbrella’s created a park-like atmosphere in the middle of the street, complete with planters filled with decorative cabbages (gotta love the decorative cabbages!)

As I continued to walk I passed little juice bars and coffee shops and restaurants, each with its own charm. The kind of places I would want to check out for a meal or an afternoon, just taking it in, watching the people. I had this sudden thought that I could spend months here and find a new place to eat every day.  I was beginning to get it.

And then of course, it happened.  I am sure that anyone who has ever been to the big apple and taken in her flair has found themselves in this oh so cliché moment when you just can’t help it…

“start spreading the news….”

“I’m leaving today…”

“I want to be a part of it (BAM!) NEW YORK NEW YORK!”

Yep – it was my sound track for the entire weekend.  But don’t worry, I kept the singing in my head …mostly.

Then, without warning, I suddenly found myself in a somewhat less quaint area filled with discount stores and people selling perfume on the street.  It was an interesting place full of some really good smells (street vendors selling uncommon and exotic foods ) and some not so good smells (you name it – I smelled it.) The energy was totally different here and I was suddenly grateful I was doing this walk in the day time.

It was in this particular part of my adventure that I was stopped dead in my tracks by a hoard of pigeons that had taken over the side of a building.  I took a picture to send to my husband because we have enjoyed the company of pigeons at our home for the past couple years – first there was “Tic” and “Tac” and then they had “Toe” and “Tic Junior” who had “X” and “O” and I was beginning to realize that if we didn’t do something about our expanding family we might be in for a similar scene at our place.

When I turned around and realized behind me there was another 80+ birds lined up on the other side of the alley, I actually started giggling with how overwhelming the scene was.  Note to self – find a new home for Tic and Tac!

Emerging out the other side of the somewhat unnerving several blocks I was right back to quaintness and stumbled upon one of my favorite guilty pleasures.  A LUSH store!!  For those of you who have never been, it is a natural beauty store where everything looks and smells so yummy you could eat it.  They cut soap off of “cheese rounds” and package everything up in deli wrapping. 

After buying a little “I should coco” for Jeff and “snowcake” for me, I continued on only to be stopped in my tracks by the most amazing window display! Children were entering their wish lists into an automated system in one window- then in the next we saw their letters swirl around and around and disappear into the distance. The next had funky elves reading the letters and making the toys.  I had arrived at Macy’s!

They don’t make Macy’s like this in Cleveland – let me tell you!  It was so beautiful I had to take pictures!

Everything is bigger and flashier In New York!  Standard stores you would see in any mall were transformed into destinations by flashing lights, over the top décor and window displays that looked like you were entering a dance party at a trendy bar, not a retail shop! Even the Walgreens took up 3 stories. I was beginning to see that we were not in Winnipeg anymore.

The one thing that was a little underwhelming was a particular famous statue that I walked by on the way.  She looked much smaller in person than she does on TV .

Just as the sun was starting to set I walked abruptly into the middle of a neon wonderland!  Everywhere I looked there were flashing video displays.  A woman dancing in a white dress, a winking 40 foot M&M.  Even a gal from Thompson, Manitoba knew Time Square when she saw it.

It was awesome.  Truly.  I was beginning to think that New York was more fun than Vegas and Disneyland put together ! And just when I thought things couldn’t get any better, I was grabbed by an adorable singing toilet and I realized my fun was just beginning!

I was lured into a building and sent up a set of stairs where I found a line of people in the shiniest prettiest bathroom you have ever seen.  There were dancing bears on tv screens singing a catchy toon “Cha-a-ar-min… Enjoy the go!”  and a guy on a microphone was entertaining the crowd with “potty humor”.  I had stumbled into an interactive promotion for Charmin Toilet paper and I cannot remember the last time I had so much fun!

The practical side of the event was the public restrooms for the holiday shoppers.  The whimsical side included a video confessional where you could go into a glass booth and share how you “enjoyed your go”, stalls with touch screen displays where you could graffiti on the walls that would then be displayed on screens around the room, and of course a 6 foot toilet photo-opp that I could not resist.

I won’t even go into the Duracell display upstairs but let’s just say they have cell phone charging stations, more fun photo opps, X-box’s and a projection of a talking virtual sales rep who’s eyes follow you wherever you go (It was really creepy.)

I checked my watch and the fun had to come to an end, It was quarter after 4 and I realized that somehow I had ended up on 7th when I had to be on 5th so I started booking it towards Rockefeller center, eyes on the look-out for the 75 foot Christmas tree.

Even with minutes to spare, New York did not disappoint. I jogged passed the Radio City Music Hall and moments later came face to face with the tree, the throngs of people, and  the skating rink and all I can say is – I was in awe.

I made it to my client's just in time and I got a view of the Ice rink from 20+ floors up as the receptionist pointed out Saks 5th Avenue and told me that they “play their windows” by flashing lights in time with holiday music (it just doesn't end!)

After a wonderful meeting over a glass of wine, my client and her driver Rudy drove me  to the hotel in her private car (talk about movers and shakers) just in time for me to drop off my coat and head down to the opening night reception for the main event. 

As I walked through the room I saw so many bright smiling faces, Cheryl Richardson was connecting with participants, I recognized Reid Tracy CEO of Hay house who would also be presenting, and to my surprise I noticed a quiet white-blond haired angel in the room who I suddenly realized could only be Louise Hay herself.

The weekend and my interactions with the "movers and shakers", the learning that occurred and the way it shook up my world, will be a story for another day but while the wonder was still fresh, I had to share my fabulous trip to New York!

As you go about your day – remember that adventures are around every corner, ready to scoop us up, bring us joy and make us feel alive.  We just have to be open and be willing to say “YES!” when life gives us her invitations to dance.
 

Here’s to wanderlust, new experiences and embracing unexpected delights.

With love,

Joelle

P.S.
When I arrived home Sunday night my husband surprised me with a fridge full of food,  his patented stir-fry and home-made cookies (notice his angelic glow below.)  Life really doesn’t get any better.  XOXO

Hi, guys!

With 3 weeks to go until our uber-active sea-kayaking vacation, my husband and I are in a desperate race to get in shape.  More specifically, we want to trade in our round jiggly shapes for something a wee bit more toned and svelte.
 

After devouring half a bag of marshmallows with complimentary graham crackers and chocolate during this past weekend’s camping trip, I could not have been more delighted to hear that my husband was on board for a new gut-and-butt-busting routine. We were drawing the line in the sand and together it was time to trade in comfort and our ever expanding waistlines for a new commitment to health and a smaller booty.

While Dr. Phil would advise we take on a “no-fail environment”, removing all offending substances from crackers to ketchup in support of our weight-loss effort, we decided to live on the edge, going for more of a “temptation and decadence around every corner environment.”  When we arrived home from camping I handed Jeff the marshmallows and remaining Hershey bar from the weekend’s fire-side revelry and unceremoniously request that he toss them in the trash.  To this he replied, “Let’s keep them in the freezer until our next camping trip.  But the catch is we can’t touch them until then. Anyone who eats the s’mores fixings between now and then pays a $100 fine!”  We shook on it and then added limits on wine consumption and made a commitment to forgo desert until our next s’mores –gasbord 2 weeks hence!
 

We started well. Monday we were up at 6 am for our run. Jeff rocked it, going 4 miles while I wogged (walk-jogged) 3, just happy to be awake to greet the gorgeous morning outside.  A sensible dinner of couscous and spicy- kale (It really was better than it sounds) and we were off to the races!

Tuesday morning we were up again at 6 am, and began with our normal warm-up chat on the way to the trail, when I innocently asked my sweet husband how he ate the day before. 
 

“Ok” he responded with a little shrug.  

I look over, interested, “Ok?” I asked, with one eyebrow cocked. “What was just ‘ok’ about it?”
A sheepish look came over his face as he revealed the reason for the “ok”.  

“I had a Clark Bar after lunch.” He grinned.

“Ohhhhhhh! I hope it was good.” I grinned with zeal. “Please do not pass go.  Please deposit $100 into the savings account at your earliest convenience.”

He put up an honest fight, protesting that his chocolate transgression was not the s’mores stuff in the freezer, nor was it “dessert” because everyone knows that “dessert” only comes after dinner J .  However, after a lighthearted conversation we both agreed that it made no sense for freezer and dinner sweets to be taboo while having a carte blanche on anything store-bought consumed before 5 pm.   And so he acquiesced, the savings account received an unexpected deposit and we both got one step closer to taking ourselves and our commitment to health seriously.

With Love (and an extra $100 )

Coach  Joelle