Hi guys,

I have a treat for you this week.

It is my honor and pleasure to introduce a very special woman, someone who I have come to know and love deeply. She is a bright light in the world and an amazing example of what it looks like when you boldly take on the process of consciously creating life.

Alexandra Jaye Johnson is the creator of www.MyGoddessLife.com, and the Rock Your Goddess Life programs, and is the Chief Community Goddess of CleanProgram.com.

I recently interviewed Alexandra as part of the Make Your Life Interview Series, and her journey to knowledge, optimum health, passionate contribution and great love holds lessons for all of us who are out to live our lives by design.

Find a comfy spot, grab a smoothie and join me as I speak with the Chief Goddess herself!

XO

Joelle

Make Your Life Interview with Chief Goddess, Alexandra Jaye Johnson

Alexandra Jaye Johnson is a Goddess. She is the creator of www.MyGoddessLife.com, the Rock Your Goddess Life programs and the Chief Community Goddess of CleanProgram.com. She is a passionate student, a lover of life and she will tell you that she is full of love, laughter, divinity, & yummy food!  Listen as she shares how you can get your goddess on! 

    DoDDownload and Listen Now!    

Download instructions: To listen, right click on the link above and select "Save Target As." Pick a folder to save your audio into.  Once the audio is saved to your hard drive you can upload it to your iPod or listen to it on your computer at your leisure. Note: Due to the file size, downloading may take a few moments. Deep breath… exhale… smile… ok, it will be there any moment now  ;-)

Hi guys!

I didn’t want to close out the week without an update and a little inspiration to keep you going or gently nudge you into getting started on your integrity experiment.
 

Already, worlds are changing for the better as people take on living as their highest selves.

• In Canada, a single mom followed her heart, declined a late night bootie call and learned something meaningful about her own value.

• In LA, the roads are a little safer through one woman’s commitment to only use her cell phone hands free.

• In Australia, a coach is living louder, raising his spiritual connection and walking his talk.

• And in Atlanta, a child is getting daily quality time with her mom.
 

AWESOME and wow!
 

As for me, this new level of intentional living has resulted in:

1 lb lost (never to be found again)
 

56$ saved in Starbucks decaf-soy cappuccino’s that I did not drink,
 

Mediation for more days strait than I can remember,
 

New learning that dark subject-matter in entertainment leads to darkness in the subconscious (violent movie = violent dreams. No thanks!)
 

Discovery of the importance of having 1 night a week responsibility-free (including free from making dinner or conversation) and a system to make it happen,
 

Reclamation of 2-3 extra hours of sleep nightly and progress towards being a well-rested woman,
 

Consultation with an applied kinesiology chiropractor and an energy worker to move my health forward and raised my body temperature from 96.5 to 97.5 degrees (WOO to the HOO!),
 

Compassionate, cathartic and intuitive conversation with my dear friend Jennifer which has already proved transformative,
 

Reaping the rewards in my marriage in more ways than I can count….
 

And it is only day 14!
 

With 16 more to go, will you join me? Learn more.

Whether you choose to live to your highest ideals for 1 day or all 16, the resultant intention, focus and thoughtful action will propel you forward, provide insight and guide you toward living the life you have imagined.
 

Jump on in! Read how you can get started here and be sure to keep me posted.
 

To your life!
 

Joelle

Hello!

I’ll tell you, my integrity experiment has provided some interesting insights so far. 
 

This weekend I discovered that to be my "best self" I need to sleep more, take time to do nothing, plan for alone time and probably get a second TV.

With my husband on a sailing adventure, swimming with wild dolphins in the Bahamas, it has been a perfect time for me to get in touch with what will best serve my experience of life.
 

Left to myself with all the time in the world, I flowed through my days satisfying the needs that presented themselves; from working out, eating and sleeping to movie-watching and shopping.
 

Thursday evening marked the first hours of total “Joelle Time”. I was called to 6:30 core training at the gym and then hit the mall until they kicked me out. Uninspired by the prospect of cooking, it was off to the patio at Chipotle for a delicious black bean salad and a twilight phone-chat with Jeff as he excitedly shared the events of the first day of his trip. Perfection.
 

After a couple of full days that included work, a wedding and a rocking "Bucket List" facilitation, Sunday was my next totally free day.  I started with an invigorating morning run and then retired to the couch, giddy with the prospect of total television domination! There would be no “Meet the Press” this Sunday, oh no! It was going to be all chick flicks all the time!
 

I grabbed some Teavanna “spice of life” tea with frothed almond milk, put on my sweats, hunkered down with a pillow, blanket, and a cat in my lap and went on to watch no less than 3 movies! 
 

As the hours passed one pure thought kept rising to the surface.  I was repeatedly struck by how completely and blissfully happy I was curled up on the couch, with no commitments, being entertained without a thought of productivity in my head.
 

By 6:00, replete with my movie marathon, I was moved to tidy up and make dinner (free range turkey burgers and a fresh vegetable salad made up of produce from our organic CSA.)
 

At 9:00 I went out to the deck to meditate, candles lit, aromatherapy on hand, another cat in my lap, wind in the trees and a red sky in the west. 
 

As I sat there in the flickering light I felt more connected, more happy and more grateful than I had felt in a very long time. 
 

I realized anew that the path to enlightenment or inner peace or whatever you want to call it is not necessarily found through activity, intense thought or spiritual reading.
 

This weekend illuminated for me that, much like Maslow’s Hierarchy, I need freedom of time, space to explore, and mental and physical rest to be able to fully get present, connect and engage. 
 

As you take on your Integrity Experiment, give yourself permission and space to get in touch with what will feed and nourish you, what will make you happy and what needs are begging to be met.
 

With love,

Joelle 

Well hello!

As you’ll recall, last week I defined the parameters of my highest ideals and began zealously embodying them in “The Integrity Experiment” (read all about it -you are very welcome to play along.)

As I put the finishing touches on my 30 day plan for exceptional living and got ready to execute, I wondered what joyous activity I would be inspired to undertake first?!

Would I be called to express my creativity with paint and canvas?

Was I in for a quiet afternoon with the enlightening works of Eckhart Tolle and Ken Wilbur?

Perhaps it would be meditation in the park!

In a flash of illumination I saw the path! I knew exactly what I needed to do.

Shockingly, the work to be done was not in any way related to philosophizing or pondering the wonders of the universe. (Whah?!)

Nope. My “highest-self” had much more humble plans for my first day on the job.

Get Your "Order" On

The message came loud and clear … “Don’t even think of getting all up in your “highest-self” without cleaning up your mess! “

And so, the first brilliant shining actions I took inside of my Integrity Experiment included sweeping up the cat-hair tumbleweeds that had formed on the hardwood floor (I can just hear the collective gasp!), folding and putting away the laundry, tidying the kitchen and unpacking the suitcase that had remained on the floor after my Canadian adventures.

I organized my desk, fluffed the pillows, and watched as a clean visual picture replaced the previous disorder. 

With the taming of our space, calm came over me and my mind found new focus.

More than “house work”, these tasks were sacred and necessary, clearing room for what lay ahead.

The Invitation:

Whether you subscribe to the principles of Feng Shui or think of it more as an internal checklist that will not fully relinquish your mind until the papers are filed and the plants watered; the need for order is paramount for those who are out to consciously create their lives.

No doubt as you read this, the places of disarray in your life are rearing their messy heads, poking at you and demanding your attention. 

Whether they are…

Files waiting to be purged,

Papers ready to be filed,

Carpets longing for the caress of the vacuum,

Desks to be cleared,

Closets to be organized,  

Shelves to be dusted,

Socks seeking their perfect match,

Or crowded rooms asking to be transformed into spaces for creativity, play or rest;

Whether it’s as simple as a 15 minute “tidy”,

Or as robust as a 20-DAY DE-CLUTTERING EXTRAVAGANZA!!!

You alone know what it will take to get you grounded, clear-headed, satisfied and freed-up to create.

So do your life a favor and get to it!

XO

Joelle

Sleeeep!!! I need Sleep!!

Ok that’s it.  My 7 hours of sleep are non-negotiable.  Well, actually the whole list is non-negotiable for the next 30 days but somehow I figured that losing sleep to get up for meditation was somehow a noble cause. It’s not.

I recouped today by grabbing an hour after the gym in the AM and then slept from 5-8 pm before I helped Jeff pack for his big sailing adventure with ocean conservationist Hardy Jones where they will swim with wild dolphins in the caribbean.
 

With Jeff away on a ship, while I will miss him, it will give me the freedom to 100% choose my schedule without having to consider anyone else.  I figure a week of experimenting on my own will then prepare me to have practice keeping this commitment when my sweet husband returns.
 

Sleep is going to happen.  All 7 hours of it every night.

You are welcome to ask me my sleep number anytime between July 16th and August 8th and the answer will be 7 or more.
 

Taking it on!
 

Joelle

You are welcome to join me!  Create your own integrity experiment and join me as we live to our highest ideals!
 

Hey there!

It's day four of my Integrity experiment and I’m liking what I’m seeing. 

I can already tell that my workouts are more intense and I even feel stronger and thinner (could be a head thing but I really feel it!)
 

My daily meditation, which is one of the most essential aspects of my experiment is already proving fruitful.  I have been consistent, even getting up before our already very early trips to the gym, and low and behold I am actually receiving guidance in the form of inspired action!

One of those inspired actions is to find an energy practice (spiritual practice.)  This is not the first time I have had this idea but as part of my experiment I am committing to finding a mentor in this area in the next 26 days (ohhhh, the pressure is on now!)

Below I have also included parameters around some of the more obvious pieces of my experiment.  I figured I would get them out into the world as it will support me in being accountable. If you happen to see me out and about blatantly violating any of the below in the next 30 days, you are welcome to call me on it.

So far, I haven’t been perfect, and that’s ok.

I am realizing that getting my 7 hours of sleep with a 5 am wakeup is going to take some extra figuring. And the lovely 0 calorie, no aspartame sparkling green tea from Whole Foods that Jeff discovered, while it meets my requirements,  invariably causes me to want to take a nap. That’s not going to cut it.

There are many moments of integrity to govern that are not related to any of the items listed below.  In those moments I have been checking my thinking and behavior to my original vision or asking the simple question “Is this in alignment with my highest self?”  Based on the answer I make the next choice.

One foot in front of the other I am climbing a ladder to my highest self.  It’s not all sparkle and wonder but it feels solid and true.
 

With love,

Joelle

Practices

1) SLEEP -7 hours  (usually means bed by 9 or 9:30)

2) Meditate Daily 15 – 30 minutes

3) Journal Daily (about the process)

4) Write 5 days a week (priority)

Body/Food

5) No soy (messes with hormones, GMO, bad for thyroid.

6) No caffeine (green tea ok)
 

7) No Soda/ no aspartame
 

8) Decaf – no more than once a week.   Process toxic. Not real food.
 

9) Alcohol -  Wine or hearty beer – max 3 per week max 2 per night never to experiencing physical effects.
 

10) 2 -80 cal servings sweets a week – has to be worth it – good stuff not junk – still in alignment with highest self
 

11) Only happy meat and dairy
 

12) 3 fruit min
 

13) 4 serv green veg min

Movement

1.  Cario 5X
 

2.  Core X2
 

3.  Weights X3
 
 

Hmmmm,

As I walk through the moments of my Integrity Experiment I have come upon an interesting thought.
 

I am taking on operating in a heightened state of integrity with the intention of living as my highest-self.
 

Only a few days in I am up against an interesting distinction; the difference  between "not violating my integrity" and "living to my highest-self".
 

For instance;

I have chosen not to drink decaf coffee as part of my experiment because I have read that the decaffeination process is toxic. As a result I made some new beverage choices. Yesterday I made frothed almond milk and Teeccino (a coffee substitute made or roasted nuts and grains.)  It was tasty and satisfying but was it a choice my “highest self” would make? 

I think my highest self would have had water and skipped the tasty cup of comfort.  So while it was not out of integrity (it did not violate the agreements I made to myself and was a healthy choice) it was also not what my highest self would do or at least my idea of my highest self.

An interesting insight on my path.  Not sure what to do with it. For now, I will drink my happy drink when I am moved to and continue to live the questions.

Any thoughts? Comments? Insights?  Would love to hear from you.

XO

Joelle
 

Good morning,

As I reflect on the events of the weekend It has been an interesting start to my experiment.
 

When I think of living as my highest self, in many ways it has an ethereal element, vibrating with clean, high energy food, meditating, taking action from a pure flow state to cause in life.  The thing is, that on a weekend, it’s not all sitting around staring at my navel and contemplating my higher self. 

On a weekend, my husband is home and we go to the gym together which usually takes 3-4 hours each day.  We run errands and have social commitments.   Hence, I was challenged to live my bliss during “core training” class, cleaning the house and attending a beer-tasting birthday gathering. 

This weekend illuminated the opportunity (a.k.a. room to grow) for me to find spirit in the mundane and to find connection at cocktail parties.  I noticed myself wanting to get through what I was doing so I could get to being my highest self! But that’s not the game I set out to play.

It is easy to feel zen-like on a yoga mat in a candle lit room, it is another to be that shopping for paper towels.

I have a knowing that all of life can be a conscious and spiritual practice, I have had times where I have lived it. That is what these 30 days are about, renewing my connection to that way of life and finding what it takes to operate there.

By taking on the practice of reading my Integrity experiment commitment at the beginning of each day I am setting myself up to be able to hold the intention and act accordingly.  By reviewing and journaling about my commitment as I prepare for bed I am able to notice where there is an opportunity to live into my intention more fully in the days to come.

As you are taking on your own Integrity Experiment (if you are not yet and want to join me you can read all about it here) remember that this is a process.  If you ate more than you said you would, make a note of it, write about what was going on with you that you made that choice, set up systems that will support you in eating in alignment next time(food journal, measure portions etc.)  and get back on that horse!  That’s how you make a real and lasting difference in your life. And believe me, YOU CAN, no matter what it is that you want to create or change.

Despite my myriad weekend commitments, I lived well.  I got inspired by my Philosophers Notes on the treadmill, I grabbed 15 minutes in a quiet studio to meditate while Jeff finished up his workout, I made salads, washed veggies for juicing and boiled eggs to prepare for the week, made a trip to Teavanna for a yummy, wholesome alternative to my decaf coffee, I journaled every day, did yoga by candlelight and made out with my husband in the car like a teenager.

All in all, a pretty darn good start.  As the work week begins I am excited to see what my experiment will bring.

Love to you!
 

Joelle

The Integrity Experiment: Day 1

What a huge day.  Jeff and I got up, spent 3 hours at the gym, ran errands and were off to a gathering. It’s 10:30 PM and it is the first time to myself I have had since I woke up.  It just goes to show that when it comes to living your ideals you need to put aside the time to get in touch with what those ideals are or you life will just sweep you away.  Good thing I put a chunk of time aside yesterday so that I could get a head start on my process.

As the document below revealed itself I got very clear that I need to read it at the start of every day, likely multiple times a day to keep my eye on the ball.

It feels good. As I wrote and as I read what I wrote it makes me sit a little taller, my head clears and a gentle smile comes to my face.  This is the template for a peaceful, powerful, balanced, healthy, spiritually-connected me.

Here we go.

I am writing to determine the parameters of My integrity experiment.  As I write I can feel the tension building.  It is the tension that is pulling me into my greatest self.  I feel a little nervous and excited all at the same time.  I am also really glad that I am sharing this with you as it ups the ante and makes me accountable (see step 3 from the Highest Ideals article.) 
 

In addition I will be documenting my experience daily and commit to blogging about it at least once a week (though I anticipate it will be more.)

So here is what living as my highest self looks like:

I am grounded, passionate and energized, operating from a highly present state.  Whether I am writing, coaching, hanging with friends, or sharing a meal with my husband I attend to the moment with a combination of energy, interest, and readiness or a solid and peaceful centeredness depending on what the occasion calls for.

I am interested and engaged in life.

When I do something – I do it all the way – full out.  No going to the gym and going through the motions.  If I am there I am intentional and focused. When my husband speaks I stop and listen intently.  When I write, I relish the writing and do not get called away by the siren song of “You’ve got mail”.

I live each moment in the full knowing that “I can” and I can BRILLIANTLY at that, even and especially the things that have been barriers in the past. Now is the time to move through those old beliefs with pure thought, passion, knowing and committed action.

I feel love. Love and appreciation for the people in my day whether they are friends, family, clients or strangers.  I see things to appreciate and things of interest all around me.

(As I write there is a static-y pressure around my head and a heighted feeling of alertness – I think I am onto something.)

Emotionally, I am calm. When pressure is on or I feel annoyance or frustration I notice it and dissipate it as it is not my optimal state and does not support me being who I choose to be.

Regarding my food, I choose to consume what is in alignment with clarity, connection to source and overall health. I choose at this time for there to be a place for the occasional glass of wine or a solid hearty beer.  I am not yet ready to believe that my best self would never have a glass of wine.  Exploring this will be a part of my experiment.

I move and work my body to a strong lean vessel that I am proud to wear.  I take action in my body to take it to a state of optimal health and freedom.

I take purposeful new action to raise my body temperature and metabolism for optimum health, energy, vitality and baby-making

I take bold and decisive action to bring the new iteration of the Coach Joelle Website into being through completing the copy writing, working harmoniously and purposefully with Jeff and the team and getting scintillating new pictures taken.

I meditate. Daily. I know this is key for alignment and flow. I choose it.

I am without fear. I self express lovingly and clearly.

I believe and allow.

I do it.

Life is electric. I live in and experience the energy of the world and source.

I live in the light and the love.

(Whoa! I can totally feel the power of what I have written. It rings true inside of me and I feel totally inspired.)

I’m ready.   It begins NOW.

Love it!
 

Now, it’s your turn.  What would living as your highest self look like?  Can you define it? If you define it do you dare to take it on? If you want to play go ahead and read about the Integrity Experiment and create your own 30 day journey to who you can be.  Be sure to let me know what you are up to and I will continue to keep you posted on my adventure.

Good stuff!  Good night.
 

Joelle

HI guys!

Last week was full of milestones.  Not only did I turn 38 but I also had the opportunity to complete two decades as a full-on contributing “adult” by attending my 20 year high school reunion. 

Facing the people from high school was in many ways a last frontier for me.  I think I turned out pretty well and at some point it seemed important that those people who knew me back then get to see who I had become.

How refreshing to find that when the moment of truth came I realized that I had nothing to prove.

I enjoyed people and we shared our stories but I did not feel the need to be witty, interesting, or the life of the party.

There were no airs to put on and no one to impress.  When I was tired I left early for bed (YUM!) and when I needed solitude I did not hesitate to leave the fray for the comfort of a book (DOUBLE YUM!)

The young woman who was once so desperate for attention and approval is no more.  In her place stands a person I could not have imagined back in 1990. 
With external standards no longer binding me, the only standard that matters is my own and of course those standards will determine the height, depth and quality of my life.

And so, for my 38th birthday I am giving myself 30 days of living to my highest ideals. I will live it, document it and at the end of 30 days see where it takes me. 

Will I feel more enlightened? Vibrant? Accomplished?

Will my marriage reach new levels of bliss?

Will I lose that last 5 lbs?

Who knows? But what I do know is that I am going hard core for 30 days and then and only then can I make a new choice.

Care to join me?

This week’s article guides you through the process of identifying, choosing, and sticking to your own highest ideals through something I am calling The Integrity Experiment.

Enjoy!

Joelle

“When you reach for the stars you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.” Leo Burnett

Living to your highest ideals: The Integrity Experiment

What would your life be like if you spent it living up to your highest ideals?

What would become possible?

What are those ideals?

Perhaps you aspire to living with compassion or acting courageously.  Maybe your best self would go heavy on the greens and give up the caffeine.  Do you aspire to becoming a non-smoker or making yourself available for quality time with your children?

When I think about living to my ideals it means living into and acting in accordance with the highest version of myself; physically, spiritually, mentally, relationally and professionally and reaping the rewards in my life. 

What’s not to love about that?!

Why would we do anything else?

Hmmmm … How about comfort, laziness, fear, discouragement, being too busy and lots of other really great reasons with which we are all too familiar.

Let’s face it, sometimes that chocolate bar looks so goooood and sometimes that extra couple hours of sleep is so much more appealing that heading off to the gym in the dark.  Can you relate?

Often our reasons for not being our best selves are disguised as the “noble option”.  We skip lunch to meet with that new client or stay up extra late to deal with things that seem pressing and urgent.

Whatever our excuses, no matter how valid, every time we consciously or unconsciously choose to violate our own standards we are making a statement to ourselves and the world about our priorities. 

Would it surprise you to recognize that you have made work a priority over your family or smoking a priority over your living a long healthy life? What if I pointed out that your desire for that fabulous new blouse or your daily $4 latte wins priority over financial stability or the ability to retire?

When we get down to it, every time we act out of alignment with our standards we are in effect telling ourselves it is ok to go half way. It is ok to not go after what I want fully. It is ok to wimp out on myself and follow my values only part of the time.

Every time we lie to ourselves and every time we bend our own rules we whittle down a little piece of our strength and our faith in our own ability. We weaken our word and in doing so we are creating a watered down version of what our life could be and pushing out the arrival date of our visions and dreams.

Ouch.

So that’s the downside of not living up to our ideals but the good news is, the upside of being our best self is nothing short of miraculous.

The world lines up at your door when you line yourself up with what is right and true for you.( Note, I said right and true for YOU, not for anyone else – the only standards to consider here are your own.)

In the coaching world we call this alignment “integrity”.

When you operate with integrity, life works, serendipities abound and you achieve a new level of freedom and flow.

For my birthday I am saying Sign Me Up for more of that!  And that is why I am giving myself the exceptional gift of consciously living to my highest ideals for the next 30 days, even when it is uncomfortable, unpopular and annoying.

I will be documenting my experiences, how it feels to live this life and whether it makes the difference I imagine or not.

I won’t kid you, this may not pretty.  In fact, I am already a little terrified of putting it all on the line for 30 days but I know that a great prize waits on the other side of my resistance.

I am calling it The Integrity Experiment and you can play too.

The invitation:

Join me in your own integrity experiment. 

1. Define Your Ideals

Set aside 30 minutes today to write about your highest ideals. 

What do you value? What would raise your quality of life? What are the things you know you need to make time for but have not?

What are the thoughts you want to nurture and practice on a daily basis?

What version of you do you want to be?

What are the things that you know you have been doing part way?  What would “all the way” look like?

What are the things that have been hanging around, dragging you down and limiting your life that you would like to clean up?

2. Make a commitment

It’s one thing to write it all down but another thing entirely to commit.

Take a look at what you wrote and see if you are ready to take on the whole enchilada or a part of it.

Give yourself a timeframe. Will your integrity experiment be for a day, a week, a month, six months?  Whatever you commit to, do it fully and honestly.

Don’t set yourself up for failure with unrealistic expectations but be sure to take on the things that are really important for you, that are worthy of your time and that will raise you in your own estimation of yourself.

3. Create a system of accountability. 

DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DO THIS ALONE.  Seriously, left to ourselves it is way too easy to try it for a day or two and give up on ourselves. By sharing your commitment with someone else you are building in an essential support system for your integrity experiment.

If you have a spouse or partner, ask them to hold you accountable. If you have a blog, say you are going to blog about it and then blog about it. If you have a friend who will share your journey, invite them to make their own commitment and give each other permission to challenge and support.

4. Plan it out

Be sure to take the time to plan where necessary to support your success.

Some things you commit to may require a reshuffling of your schedule –  like daily meditation – you already have a full and busy life so where do you fit that extra 30 minutes?

Others may require a prolonged process  and would be served by an action plan -like a comprehensive smoking cessation plan or a plan to grow your capacity for optimism over time.

5. Record Your Experience

Every day, possibly multiple times a day, record what you are experiencing.

Celebrate where you have made choices in alignment with your ideals, notice where have you given in or gone half way or where you outright chose to break your commitment.  All is valuable in your process. 

Notice where your current life circumstances and present choices stand in the way of you operating in integrity with your commitment and then without making yourself wrong, or beating yourself up, ask how you can adjust, learn and move forward. 

6. Remember It’s a Process

If you think you are going to launch out the gate with a 3 page document detailing your highest self and never ever falter, you may be in for a harsh awakening. 

This is a process.  In making your commitment you will learn about what it really takes to live that commitment.  Sometimes what it takes is far more than we imagined. 

You will stumble, you will resist and sometimes your best will not be good enough.  Your setbacks are not a sign to quit – it is simply time grab on tightly to your commitment and seek out additional information, different resources or greater support. 

Whether you envision your best self as a non-smoker, a parent who is around to make a difference in the lives of your children, or someone who acts courageously in spite of fear, remember that if it is a worthy ideal for you then some way, somehow you can live it.

Use Your Coach

I encourage you to take on your own integrity experiment and if you do, let me know.  Send me an email or comment on the blog below and I will check in on you. 

Be sure to share what you are committing to, why it will matter for you, the length of your experiment (3 days, 1 week , a month?) and who in your life will be supporting you and providing accountability (besides me.)

Along the way, if you find yourself in a difficult spot or at an impasse, post a comment here and I’ll give you what I’ve got to get you back on that horse and moving forward.

You can read all about my personal 30 day declaration right here tomorrow.  (Eeek!) 

Alright! We are off to the races. 

Bring It!

Joelle

Hi guys!

Last week we explored a powerful model that was instrumental in illuminating some of my personal stumbling blocks on my way to love.  If you recall, I was shocked to find that all my broken relationships were not the fault of the myriad men I had dated but, in fact, were due to my own insecurities and fears. 

Fortunately SEE BE DO GET came to the rescue showing me the error of my thinking and illuminating how a new point of view can turn everything around.

If you are joining us part way through the story you can get caught up by reading Part One here.

As our saga continues, you will learn how I found my way out of romantic self-sabotage and into a whole new world of men and dating (a Mecca of Men in fact!)

As you hear my tale remember, this model works in any life situation, not just for those who are amorously clueless, so consider as you are reading how you could use this model to chart a course to something bright shiny and new for you.

See what happens next as I do away with desperation and own my capacity to find great love without compromise.

Enjoy!
 

Joelle

SEE BE DO GET And The Mecca of Men Part 2

Here's where we left off. 

If you recall… my thoughts of being geeky and undesirable were affecting my confidence and having me show up small.  I was compromising myself, afraid to go after what I really wanted and I was leaving a wake of broken relationships and hurting partners in my path. 

Not to mention, this behavior was getting me no closer to finding lasting, hang-out-on-the-porch-holding-hands-when-you’re-90 love.

It was time to get over myself and get on with the lovin’.  So I took the SEE BE DO GET model, began at the end and started working backwards.

Here’s how it went.

SEE BE DO GET – Reverse Engineering

I didn’t like the results I was producing in my relationships so it was time to step back, start with the end in mind…and ask, what DID I want to get?

GET – What do you want to GET? (Your outcome or end result)

What I wanted to GET was a delightful life partner who cherished me. I wanted to find the man or better yet, be found by the man who would light my eyes up and make my heart sing.  I wanted the guy who matched "My list” (and oh yes, I had a list). I had a BIG LIST but it just isn’t much use when you toss the list in the trash on the first date!

DO – What could you DO? (Your action or inaction.)

We will come back to the DOING in a minute.

BE  – How would you need to BE? (i.e. "be happy" "be sad" "be passionate")

If I wanted to get my result, how did I need to BE? What ways of BEing would make my result possible – because being shut down, shy and desperate wasn't it!

Here is what I came up with:

Being: Loving, Open, Courageous, Comfortable, and Out There (all me all the time)

Ah, that’s more like it!

Next!

SEE – Your new point of view or perspective (Your Perception or view of the world.)

Which leads us to the question….what perspective or what point of view would support me in "Being Open, Loving, Courageous, Comfortable and Out There?"

Well, I thought about it. Clearly, if I was going to find a man that matched my list I was going to have to believe that:

A) He was out there and 

B) He would actually want to date me.

I thought about it a bit and I came up with a pretty bold new perspective (SEE) that I chose to take on.

Are you ready for it? It’s a doozy!

(Drum roll please.)

"ARIZONA IS A MECCA OF MEN WAITING TO ASK ME OUT!"

Yep, that's it.

Now remember! I am not saying this was the truth – who knows what the truth was?  What I do know is that this was a much more empowering thought to take me out in the world of dating from a position of strength.

This thought gave me hope and confidence.

There was an abundance of men and they were waiting for me. Bring it on!
 

So now I want to bring you back to that DO we left empty.

DO

Through my reverse engineering project, I had a new point of view, a new way to SEE the world and I had a new way of BEING (Loving, Open, Courageous, Comfortable) and suddenly, I had a whole new world of action and DOing available to me! 

For instance…

If I saw a man I was attracted to, I could actually look him in the eye, and more than that, I could go up to him and talk to him and if I was moved to do so I could even, (gasp!) ask him out! 

Suddenly, I was smiling, and talking and meeting men everywhere and it was easy! I felt good about myself because I was no longer afraid of them running screaming from the “geek”!  From my new point of view, they had, after all, been waiting for me to show up so I had nothing to fear.

I was even feeling so brazen that one day I was sitting in Starbucks and I had the revelation that I could walk into any coffee shop and walk out with a date!

Wow! What a concept, hanging out on a Tuesday, sipping my Grande decaf soy cappuccino,  doing a little work and I could get a date! Wild Stuff!

And then I took it a step further.

I realized that even if there were no eligible men in the in the vicinity, with my new attitude, I could walk up to a happy-looking couple and say,

"Hi! My name is Joelle and I noticed you guys seem really happy.   I am looking for an incredible guy so that I can have a loving long-term relationship and I was wondering if you have anyone in your life that I just HAVE to meet? Oh and by the way, here’s my list."

Now, I never actually did say this but I realized that I could have if needed and that’s what counts.

So what did all these bold actions, empowering thoughts and new ways of being do for me?  

Well for starters I was asked on 5 dates in the first week (and this from a girl who previously didn't know how to date – I just knew how to get committed) and over the next 12 months I came to feel comfortable in my skin.

I learned to love and appreciate myself and I had the courage to hold out for my list.

I was truly ready to meet someone wonderful who made my heart swell and who cherished and loved me deeply.

And then….. I married him.

The Invitation:

Your turn! What do you want? Really!

Now, GET DO BE SEE your way into a new point of view that will support you in having it.

1) GET: Start with your new result.  What do you want to GET.

Skip over DO until the end.

2)  BE:  Ask yourself “How would I need to BE to even have a chance of getting that result?”

You will find that it is often diametrically opposed to how you were BEing around the situation previously and this clarity often brings with it a major Ah Ha! It certainly did for me in the story above.

3) SEE: Ask yourself “What new thought, point of view or perspective would naturally allow me to BE the way that I have chosen to BE?”

This can take some work. I was able to go big declaring the world a MECCA OF MEN and me as highly sought after – I was feeling pretty bold that day – but for you it might be something more subtle like “There is someone for me, we are destined to find each other and that special person will love me exactly as I am.” Either would work so just find a thought that actually lines up with what you want instead of opposing/repelling it.

4) DO: Finally, with your new point of view and your new way of BEing, you can identify the new and sometimes previously unimaginable action available to produce your result.

I love this model.  It changed my life and I watch it work miracles with my clients everyday (no joke.) 

Use it, practice it.

Create your own Mecca of men, abundance of opportunity, bounty of boldness or plethora of possibilities and allow your new point of view to work its magic in your world.

With Love,

Joelle

Have you ever changed your point of view and it changed your whole life? Leave a comment below and share the inspiration.

Hi Guys!

If we’ve known each other for awhile, you no doubt have heard me expound the virtues of SEE BE DO GET, a simple but mind-blowingly effective model that can be used for everything from growing your income to getting along with your mother-in-law.

When I first began practicing this model 7 years ago it did remarkable things for my mindset, removing my negative and disempowered thinking and replacing it with optimism and a crystal focus on what I wanted from life.

Through the practiced use of this model I began to see life forming according to my vision, new success and accomplishments abounded and my daily life began to take on a much more peaceful, happy and joyful tone.

This week I have illustrated this impactful model through part 1 of a 2 part saga called the “MECCA OF MEN” Story, a detailed account of my own quest to overcome the self-defeating thoughts that thwarted me on the path to finding love. 

Enjoy reading about my journey through the jungles of my own mental mess and get this model creating magic in your life.

With love,

Joelle

 P.S. If you want to hear more about the MECCA OF MEN and other powerful tools to access the magic in your life, check out my new CD An Introduction To Passionate Powerful Living.  It is an awesome launching tool to begin creating life you love.

SEE BE DO GET And The Mecca of Men

The Wake Up Call

Sometimes life just grabs you by the neck and says “WAKE UP! This isn’t working!”

These inevitable reality checks are not always welcome in the moment but at the end of the day I have found they are essential to living a good life.

This particular wake-up came through a routine experiment, a journey into new awareness through a common personal development exercise.

The task: to interview peers and friends to gain insight into what kind of person they thought I was.

The first few conversations had gone brilliantly! All good news. Whew!

Not to say I wasn’t open to a healthy dose of constructive feedback, but I would be lying if I said that I wouldn’t have been happy with all A’s. 

Fortunately for me, and for any hope I had for true love, a perfect score was not in the cards. 

Continued from the Livloud! Newsletter

This day there was an important bit of information which needed to be divulged, no matter how brutal; A piece of information that would light a fire under my proverbial romantic butt and shift the course of my life forever.

It started innocently enough. It was cappuccinos and conversation at a nearby Starbucks with a friend.  As we prepared to get down to the business at hand I was interested to hear her words, reflecting back to me the person I had become.

But, like I said, I was in for a bit of a surprise.

We began…

“Deanna, thank you for joining me. As I mentioned on the phone, the intention of this conversation is to gain insight into your personal perspective of me, who I am and what I stand for in the world.”

I shared this in my most open and inviting tone and continued. 

“Please do not hesitate to speak your truth, and know that you will not hurt my feelings. I will not hold anything you say against you so just speak freely.”

She said she understood.  We began.

“Question 1: What do you know about me?”

I waited calmly for her answer, pen in hand, an eager look on my face. And there it was, right out of the gate. 

“Well, one thing that I know about you”

She began casually

“is that you have terrible luck with men.  You have had some major relationship issues!”

I maintained a calm demeanor and willed my heart to stay in my chest as my mind was swept into a frenzy with this latest news flash.  Woah! Ok! Of all the things this woman knew about who I was in the world, the number one thing at the top of the “stuff I know about Joelle list” was that my love life is a debacle?

This is how people see me? Really?! Not that I am a great coach, not that I am a loving friend, not that I had a keen sense of style but that my romantic life was a mess?!!

Joelle Prochera, Life Coach, Speaker, entrepreneur, romantic disaster. Ugh!

It All Comes Down To “Stinkin’ Thinkin’”

Deanna’s candidness set me on a journey to uncover the root of my relationship problems and my tendency towards "serial monogamy" – going from one long term relationship with an unsuitable suitor to the next. 

I didn’t realize it at the time, but despite my intense desire to find and keep that one special guy, my relationships were doomed to fail.

 
You see, I was living with a disempowering, union-trashing perspective that even the most dashing prince charming was powerless against. It seemed I had to first slay my own dragons or suffer a lifetime of mediocre relationships and inevitable breakups.

 
The culprit to all of my relationship woes was a particular unpleasant thought I harbored.

This thought was that “I was a geek" and a "loser" (I would never call anyone else these names, but these are the names that stayed with me), I was not good enough and I was afraid that if I approached some man I really liked that they would look down their nose at me, shout “get away from me you geek!” and go after some hot, cool girl. 

Pretty juvenile, huh? Petty, harsh and unfair, but such is often the case with our untrained minds and our self-defeating beliefs.

If I was going to get past my thinking and get on with finding a the man of my dreams I was going to have to get the true impact of continuing down the mental path I was on.

The SEE BE DO GET model.

Four little words SEE BE DO GET and the problem became quite clear.

Let me elaborate.

The basic premise of the SEE BE DO GET Model is that your thoughts or perspective (SEE) shape your feelings (BE) and action (DO) to produce a result (GET) in alignment with it. 

With this in mind it was suddenly no mystery why my relationships were not working out.

 
Let's take a look at what was going on:

SEE – what you SEE (Your Perception or view of the world)

My perception or my particular view of things was that I was a geek and not cool enough and anyone I would want to date would not want to date me.

Also, I saw dateable men as a little dangerous. They could "reject" me.  If I took the risk of going after these “dangerous” men I would give them the power to prove that I was truly "not good enough" should they choose not to date me.

BE – your way of being ("be happy" "be sad" "be passionate")

This concern and insecurity lead me to BE hesitant, a little shy, awkward and desperate (yes, completely and utterly desperate.)

DO – What you do (Your action or inaction.)

Believe me walking around hesitant, shy and desperate is not good news when you are trying to get a date. My insecurity showed up in awkward conversations and personal compromises. 

It lead me to avoid talking to men I was attracted to and if I did talk to them I was not myself. I was uncomfortable and I was trying too hard.  

It lead me to enter into long-term committed relationships with men simply because they would have me even when I knew we were clearly not a match.

GET – What you get (your results)

What I got was a perpetual cycle of difficult and often disappointing long- term relationships that ended in the inevitable breakups. I fell into one 6-month relationship after the next, never getting any closer to finding someone with whom I could spend my life.

Without this insight, this clarity of how my thoughts and my personal view of myself was shaping my life I might have been left thinking that “there are no good men” or “all the good ones are taken” or the, oh so dramatic “Why is life so UNFAIR?”

Thank goodness for me, I was exposed to these concepts so that I could actually understand that it wasn't all the men that were the problem.

Nope, the blame for my sad dating situation sat squarely on my own shoulders and it had nothing to do with the afore mentioned “geeky-ness”. 

Clearly, I was hiding out, playing small, being less than. 

I was not honoring my own value and I was walking around like the insecure 13- year-old I had once been and not the competent, strong woman I had become.

I was putting myself in unfortunate situations with men I had no business being with.  Not fair to them, not fair to me and it was not going to cut it anymore.

The good news is that once I uncovered the source of my smallness and my disempowerment I realized that a slight attitude adjustment might just get me on the track to love and happiness.

Next week I will share how I turned things around and how you can too, but in the meantime, you can use the SEE BE DO GET model to reveal what thoughts might be holding you back.  Knowledge is power so get to it!

The Invitation:

Take a Look at your goals and dreams, your relationships and your life in general.  Notice your current thought patterns, your beliefs and your perspectives (SEE) and particularly notice any thoughts that might be in conflict or would stand in the way of what you want.

Referencing the SEE BE DO GET example above identify how those thoughts are making you feel (causing you to BE).

Notice what action you are taking and what you are avoiding, the conversations you are having and not having (DO). 

Notice the results you are getting (GET). Can you see how your results are in some ways tied to your thoughts and perspective? Is it time for a new point of view?

If you are not thrilled with where your current perspective is taking you, do not fear, we are only getting warmed up.

Thanks to a little SEE BE DO GET action, my love story has a happy ending.  By the end of it I was walking up to strangers and asking for dates at Starbucks – but I am getting ahead of myself.  Before I did anything so bold as make eye contact with an eligible bachelor, I first had to undergo a major mental make-over.

Next week I’ll share how I did it and how you can do it too.

See you next Week for part 2!

With Love,

Coach Joelle

 Hi guys!

For years I have been nurturing the vision of bringing you an over-the-top retreat experience that could literally change your life. 

Not only did I want to be able to give you access to all of the wonder, insights and tools that I have seen transform people’s lives through professional coaching, but I wanted it to be in a beautiful, nature-filled, relaxing and immersive setting where you could really let go and have the time and mental space to connect to yourself and your dreams and begin to make them real.

I am excited to announce that it’s happening this September 26 – October 2, 2010, when 10 special people will embark on a transformational tall ship sailing adventure to their Amazing Life!

Read all about it, and if your body sighs and your eyes sparkle as you imagine what you might create in your own amazing life, I suggest you meet us in Grenada for a vacation you will never forget!

See you on deck!

Coach Joelle

A Whole New Kind of "You Time"

The moment you place your bare feet on the teak wood deck, the stress of life melts away.

Finally, you have the time to rest, connect, reflect and create without interruption.

You have dreams that have been in hibernation waiting for their time to be made real.

Their time is now.

What would “AMAZING" look like for you?

 

Have you ever taken the time to ask yourself what your version of an “amazing life” would look like?

• Do you dream of a new career but don’t know where to get started

Are you looking for deep soulful love but somehow you keep experiencing
heartbreak?

Do you long for a change in location so you can finally start your dream life but feel too tied down to actually make the change?

Or maybe you just want to be happy, to live with greater freedom in life, greater peace and greater joy.

If you are ready to let go of what has been stopping you from claiming the life you've imagined, you want to be on this ship! Read More

Read More About The Amazing Life Cruise

Hi Guys!

Several years ago I had the pleasure of meeting a brilliant young man whose capacity for risk-taking and his pure tenacity brought him significant entrepreneurial achievement well before the age of 30. 

His name is Mike and, on the outside, Mike was living one heck of a success story but, on the inside, things looked much different.

With his rise came new challenges and Mike found himself alone and in unfamiliar territory. When he looked out to the business community for camaraderie, connection and support he saw nothing but hostile ground.

He found the community leaders were intimidating, aloof and elusive. Even his vendors seemed distant and disrespectful!

As with most things that are not working in our lives, we discovered that Mike had some significant disempowering beliefs he was holding, and I was certain that these were serving as a barrier to him connecting meaningfully with his peers in the business world.

When we dug in we uncovered that Mike saw himself as “an underling and a second-class citizen.”

He was certain that other business owners and the movers and shakers of the world were not only out of reach but decidedly uninterested in someone like him.

These beliefs not only stopped him from taking action and weakened any effort he might attempt but they seemed to put a grey film over his entire being.  

Mike had succumbed to his own life-sucking negative thinking and it would just not do!

To help clear the shadows and reclaim his confidence I walked Mike through a process that I use in the Make Your Life Program called Exorcizing Your Alter Ego. 

In this process we actually pull the negative thoughts right out of your head, and give them an identity.  By distinguishing these thoughts for what they are – a useless blob of inaccurate and unhelpful mental junk – the individual gains a new power to put these thoughts aside instead of believing them and living under their tyranny.

For Mike, when he was able to distinguish the thoughts that were holding him back,  pull them out and get a really good look at them, a huge light bulb went on!

This is what was illuminated….

“I can see it!” Mike exclaimed! “It is as though I have this set of advisors sitting with me around a large table. 

Many of them praise me, acknowledge my successes, see all that I have done and celebrate my potential but…. there is one who is not so generous. 

There is one who sees my limitations.  He tells me I can’t cut it, that the people I want to know want nothing to do with me and that I will fail, crash and burn and leave my employees out on the street without jobs. “

“But get this!” He continues incredulously. “Guess where this guy is sitting? For some reason I gave him the seat at the head of the table!  As though he’s right! As though what he has to say is so much more valid and important than all the good stuff coming from everyone else!! “

It was a powerful insight and a wonderful analogy but Mike wasn’t done. He went on to declare…

“From here forward I will absolutely not let “Doubt” sit at my table!!”

And that moment of clarity, freed his mind and the rest followed (A la En Vogue.)

He wrote it on his wall, looked at it every day and lived by it.

In the following 4 months Mike met more business leaders than he had spoken to over the previous 4 years. 

He was connecting with the city’s movers and shakers and, lo and behold, they were actually excited to know him and collaborate!

Vendors not only found a new responsiveness, they were flying him out to see them, greeting him with limos and taking him out on yachts!

And the business community he had deeply longed to fit into had started congregating at his facility for their social mixers.

The world changed for him and a world of opportunities opened up when he stopped letting doubt sit at his table. 

Who are you letting sit at your table?

As you read about Mike, you no doubt recognized that you have some of your own limiting thoughts rolling around and limiting your life.  If you check in and see who the offender is, can you name him or her?

Is “Doubt” sitting at the head of your table?

Perhaps it’s “Fear”…

Or “Self hatred” (ouch)

Or “Criticism”

(I used to have someone I call “Betty” sitting at the head of my table but now I keep her in a very small box, in an attic in Switzerland!)

The invitation:

Take a few minutes to get in touch with your own self-critic by writing out some of its favorite lines (you know then ones  “you’re not good enough” “you will fail” “nobody likes you”) and then give your new friend a name. 

Recognize that they have no place sitting at your table (much less at the head of it) and reclaim your rightful spot in the seat of honor.

Freedom awaits! (More elbow room too!)

Joelle

Need a little help with those disempowering beliefs?  Connect to your personal power with Coach Joelle's new CD An Introduction To Passionate Powerful Living.  
 

Hello fabulous ones!!

This day has been a long time coming.

It has taken 37+ years of life experience,

20 years exploring and learning in the world of psychology and coaching,

A good 10 (ish) years of being a conscious creator in life…

Not to mention hours in the studio,

The incredibly skilled composing and sound editing of Tiffany Prochera of Swimming Tigress Music

And the brilliant design ability of Ashley Messner, graphic designer extraordinaire, 

to bring you my NEW FABULOUS BUNDLE OF JOY AND EMPOWERMENT…

An Introduction To Passionate Powerful Living CD Audio Program!!

The world is an amazing place and every single one of us has the power to create a life that is meaningful and on-purpose, a life that delights and inspires us.  My intention in creating this CD was to give any person the basic tools to begin to dream their dream, live their truth, access their power and experience the magic that is a natural and readily-available part of the human experience.

Mission accomplished!

Whether you are ready for a new adventure in your life or there is someone you love whom you'd like to see awakened to their personal power and their ability to take charge of their future, this CD is for you.

You can order it today for $21.97 US (Plus shipping and handling) and it would be my greatest pleasure to package it up and send it out to you, or you can download it for $19.75 and start RIGHT NOW!

Order An Introduction To Passionate Powerful Living

May this message of hope and empowerment make a difference in your life and those whom you cherish.  The tools provided in this program have literally transformed every aspect of my life and I watch them work miracles every day in the lives of my clients. It is my honor and pleasure to share them with you.

With Love,

Joelle

Hi Guys!

Did you know I possess an amazing superpower?!

That’s right, I, Joelle Prochera can create clouds in my living room!!!

Let me elaborate.  Have you ever had a time in life when everything just seemed a little dimmer, when the colors were less bright and life seems somehow distant and removed? 

Have you noticed how a room, any room – your office, your bedroom, your living room – can be a place of possibility, creativity and joy one day, and can transform into a dark, cold and lifeless place on another, depending on the mood or perspective we bring to the moment. 

That’s it! That’s what I’m talking about – creating clouds in your living room!

I remember the moment I realized I had this awesome power.  The insight I gained that day has deeply affected my ability to access happiness in my own life and today my intention is to share what I have learned so you can access more power over your own.

It was Arizona, in the spring of 2001.  Entering into my 3rd year in the land of perpetual sun, I had long ceased checking the weather channel.  I did not even need to open my eyes in the morning to know that the day had a 95% chance of being warm and sunny (the other 5% it was HOT and sunny.)

Despite the blaring sun and brilliant blue sky, on this day, as I sat at my dining room table, I realized that I was in a decidedly un-sunny mood.

In fact, I felt awful. Totally blah.

I am sure if anyone were to peak in on me, I must have been quite a mess.  My eyes were scrunched up and I had a sour look on my face. My shoulders were hunched over and I was a million miles from feeling even remotely motivated to do anything enlivening or productive.

This was a problem. 

I had things to do! Back then, I was a fledgling coach, thick in the middle of my education, with hours of reading and homework awaiting my focus and attention.  This was no way for a coach to feel!  I had to get it together fast!

The more I sat and stewed the more I became frustrated.  How could I be grumpy or angry or bummy? I had lives to change, for heaven sakes! It was completely unacceptable.

But I couldn’t just snap out of it.

And I became truly concerned.

How could I suddenly feel so wrong when less than 24 hours before, everything was fine.  Or at least it seemed fine.

Wait a minute!! Maybe it wasn’t fine and I just didn’t realize it!!

After all, something had to be wrong with my life, wrong with ME, that I would feel this bad and this lifeless, I reasoned.

Desperate to understand my foul mood, I began scavenging for what was amiss so I could fix it!

True, on the surface, my life looked fine.  But if I strained and focused and dug down enough, there indeed appeared to be some small cracks in my fabulous life.  Hungry for answers, I stuck my nails into those cracks and pried them wide open.

The more I scrutinized each part of my life, each piece of me, the more I realized there was actually a heck of a lot wrong! 

Clearly I was not living up to my professional potential. That must be why I feel so awful!  Ah Ha!

My boyfriend was not being as sweet as usual. Perhaps it’s time I get a new one.  I think we’re getting somewhere here!

I was living in a fabulously-decorated apartment that resembled living at a resort, but it wasn’t a house.  That was definitely wrong! Clearly, if I was good enough and successful enough, I would have bought some real estate already!  That must be it!

And don’t even get me started about the size of my…..  Bingo!

Then a moment of clarity caused an abruptly halt to my brutal assault.

Everything got really quiet as a curious thought fought its way into my awareness.

Maybe, just maybe, there was no “REAL” reason that I felt bad. 

Maybe I just felt bad because my body was having a bad day.

Maybe I was hungry or dehydrated.

Maybe I was “hormonal”.

Or maybe, as my mom would so often suggest (and I would vehemently deny) I just needed a nap.

Maybe there was nothing wrong at all and tomorrow I would wake up to a new day full of hope and possibility!

Wait a minute!

UNLESS….

What if I wake up tomorrow and I feel better physically, BUT I am left with these hard won stories of why my life sucks!

Whoa!!

Let’s just say it was one of those “ton of bricks” moments.

I realized that my ardent efforts to uncover what was really wrong with me could create a new thought, a new belief about how wrong life was, about how broken I WAS!  A belief that WOULDN’T go away with a nap or a glass of water. 

This realization, changed my life. 

It gave me new appreciation for the power of my mind and how it could be used for good or for misery.  It also gave me a new respect for the state of my very influential body.

Today, if I’m crabby, I take a nap (thanks mom.)

If I am particularly annoyed, I check the calendar to see what time of month it is. My husband has become a great help with this. Oh, and I found out “there’s an app for that”.

And when I feel sad or quiet or dark, when the clouds seem to gather in my living room, instead of attempting to justify them with elaborate tales of what might be wrong with my life….

I step out for a walk in the sun,

disperse the gloom with a call to a loving friend,

or just allow them to be, knowing that it is part of life, it is fine and it will pass.

The invitation:

The next time you feel a little lost, sad or dark, consider that perhaps there is nothing wrong.  Instead of analyzing or ruminating, try getting quiet and checking in with your body.  Ask it if there is something it needs from you.  Perhaps it needs to S   T    R    E     T    C    H.  Or maybe it’s hungry.  Or maybe it needs a nap. Or perhaps, it just needs to be grumpy for a minute or an hour or a day and maybe that is ok too.

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Signing off … It’s nap time!

Hi guys,

Just in case you are one of those people who has stress in your lives (A.K.A. you are a human being)… here is a little something to help unload your work week pressures and get you chilled-out for a fabulous weekend.

STRESS, we all have it, it’s a part of life, however, I think it is fair to say that most of us:

a) Don’t fully realize what a real threat stress is to our health and happiness.

b) Don’t feel truly empowered to reduce the stress in our lives. 

Here is the deal. Prolonged, chronic stress is serious stuff.  It will make you sick and it feels crummy.  You know this.

The good new is that you have the power to make a significant and immediate impact on your stress levels with a little conscious INTENTION-setting and some focused ATTENTION to that amazing body of yours (watch the video – you will see what I mean.)

Why not take 5 minutes, right now, and bring a little more Zen to your busy day.  Join “That’s Life” host, Robin Swoboda, Dr. Michael McKee of the Cleveland Clinic, and I as we discuss how you can effectively manage your stress.

Ok, sit back….

Deeeeeeep Breath….

You are 5 minutes away from a less stressed you!

Let’s go!

Coach Joelle

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With the coming of spring, I find there is part of me that warms and expands with the thawing of the earth. 

A piece of me that has been waiting quietly for the time when I can return to living with the windows open, to inhaling the subtle scents of dirt and growing things, and, like a cat in the windowsill, to laying in grassy patches, the sun warming my chilled bones.  It is a time when nature calls me to come and dance with her, and when I heed her call, my body and mind invariably are rewarded with what can be best described as a long, deep, cellular exhale. Ahhhhhhhhhhh

Today the call was loud and clear; her lure undeniable, I followed. 

I walked the 300 feet to our little patch of community wilderness (some would call it a park, but that would be a stretch.)

A mug of hot water and lemon in hand, I planted myself on top of a picnic table, unconcerned that the boards, damp from last night’s rain, would leave me a little soggy.

My plan was to meditate, eyes closed, mind open, maybe a little “OM” for good measure, but as often happens, today meditation found its own form.

Today, I sat in the tress, and grass and just ….was.

I sipped my lemon tonic and took in the world around me.

I spotted out of the corner of my eye, a robin digging up breakfast. I followed her until a cloud caught my attention.

Like Alice’s “White Rabbit” he moved across the sky rapidly, late for some important date, literally forming as he traversed the sky. 

My cloud moved on and was replaced in my awareness by a lone leaf on a maple tree cordially waving “hello”.

Racing clouds and waving trees are all fine and good but my call to nature and desire to meditate this morning were not merely born of some noble quest for enlightenment.  No, my body and mind has been stressed. I have been living with a background of anxiety for several days and I made this trip with the explicit intention to get free.

For as long as I can remember, the forest has been a welcome reprieve to the stresses of life.  As I was growing up in the Canadian north, we had a cabin on a lake. A favorite pastime was to hike to my prized discovery, an outcropping of bedrock nestled between the cottages.  Hidden on 3 sides by trees, the forth side of my little piece of paradise was lakeside property. I spent countless afternoons feeling the sun warm the rocks, listening to the loons call, dipping my feet in the numbing water and having conversations with my creator. 

You can take the girl out of the woods but it seems you can’t take the woods out of the girl, for no sooner had I gotten settled into my spot in the park this morning, I found myself recreating those connected moments at Setting Lake, asking questions of the universe,  my subconscious, and the trees.

“Ok, what’s up? Why the anxiety? What am I afraid of? How can I find peace?”   I asked.

The answer came quickly, “because you are confused. You have forgotten who you are.”

I was suspicious.  This sounded familiar, every self empowerment/path to enlightenment book on the planet was going to take me down this path. I challenged the thought, concerned my mind was playing tricks, throwing out random bits of disembodied wisdom it had saved for just such an occasion. 

Unphased by my skepticism, it continued.

“Look at the tree…the cloud…the dandelion…”

I looked, and as I looked, I saw that they were beautiful; that they were perfect; each in their own unique way.  Whether the tree was a big tree or a little one, whether the dandelion was a bright yellow sun or its frail remains, disbursed by the slightest wind or a child’s wish; they were good.

In the next moment, the question came,

“How are you different from the tree?”

“The cloud?”

“The dandelion?…”

And I saw it.  I saw truth in that moment.

I am not different.  The tree, the dandelion, the cloud, and me, we all came from the same place.  We are all built to do what is in our nature to do.  To grow, to head towards the sun, to move with the seasons and the cycles of life. 

I would never ask anything from the tree but to BE and to do what it is here to do; flower in the spring, sleep in the winter, grow with each passing year.  Why would I think there is any greater expectation of me?

And In that moment, I saw life in a way that relieved every fear, every touch of anxiety, ever bit of pressure and expectation, and left only peace and knowing.

Maybe this is what little ten year old Joey instinctually knew back on the rock at Setting Lake. Regardless, I am so grateful to know it now, if even for a fleeting moment.

You may not have grown up in the woods like I did.  You may not even be a big fan of trees and dirt and the things that come with them, and you may not be searching for the meaning of life. 

But let me tell you this.  

You are a part of nature and the natural world calls to every single cell of your being.

The world we have created allows us to live without ever stepping foot in a garden or being surrounded by silent wilderness. We have done an excellent job of separating ourselves, but along with the comforts of a warm bed and central air, we have deprived our souls of the wisdom and beauty that is nature’s alone to give.

 
The invitation:

I do not know what your brushes with nature will reveal to you but I know she holds a piece of you in her hands;  some wisdom, some peace, some beauty, something uniquely for you and the nurturing of your soul.

No matter where you live – there is nature waiting for you; in a nearby park, a walking path, a community garden or your own backyard creation. 

Do yourself a favor, go there. Be there, and let the natural world share her wonders, healing and love. 

When nature calls…. PICK UP!

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Share Yourself:   Do you have a favorite spot to go be with nature? Have you had a moment in nature that deepened your experience of life or brought you new answers and wisdom?  Tell us about it here  on the Coach Joelle Blog.
 

Are you willing to go all the way to have the life you've Imagined?

It’s an interesting question… and an important one.

Your answer will determine the heights you will reach, the goals you will accomplish and the dreams you will bring into reality.

On first glance you may think “Yes, of course! Sign me up!” But on closer inspection you begin to realize that agreeing to go “all the way” may be asking a lot from you, perhaps more than you planned. It may push you to untold limits.  It may even drastically alter your life.

With this in mind, I ask you, “ Is there something that you want for your life so much that you are willing to go all the way, even when you are not yet sure what ‘all the way’ means?  Are you willing to declare your intention, to make a commitment and create that future NO MATTER WHAT?”

Hmmm?

To be clear, I do not mean acting against your values or scratching and biting your way to the top no matter who get’s hurt – that is not the “all the way” I am talking about. I am talking about going beyond fear, beyond discomfort, beyond what you know, to have that thing, experience, or accomplishment you have imagined in your life.

As human beings, we are pretty remarkable. Almost anything we can dream up, we can create in our lives, but (and there’s a BIG BUT) it is going to take something.  Great lives do not come from sitting around and numbing to the TV, and great change does not come from being comfortable and doing what you have always done. 

You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however. ~Richard Bach

Going For It!

 Let me give you an example about an “all the way” adventure I am taking on in my own life. It started in November as a clear desire to be thin, strong and healthy. 

This is not a new desire.  My entire life, I have wanted to be a narrow person ("hipped", not "minded".)

Four years ago I found the magic bullet, a food plan that took me into high school weight territory and it was awesome! I loved the way I felt, I loved the way I looked. I was in the zone, and excited to see where my continued diligence would take me. 

And then I got complacent. 

And then I got lazy. 

And I started veering off the plan.  And over these past 4 years, I found myself a long way from the lean person I had been.

So this fall, I hired my food coach again. I pulled out my worksheets and my food log and I started back on my plan. This time, I knew it was a lifestyle, a forever thing.  I committed to getting thin and strong and healthy and staying there, WHATEVER IT TAKES!

Little did I know that it would take as much as it has.

Even with the coach and the plan, in the first months, for some reason, I toyed with the rules, grabbing a chocolate bar here and there, throwing in a little cheese for good measure.  My dalliance lead to debacle as Christmas at my mom’s place went from 1 day off plan, to, ok 2 off plan days, to, ok, this can be an off plan week! which led to numerous instances of gross culinary negligence, including but not limited to, devouring a whole box of Turtles in one sitting. Not good!

So, with the wind of a new year beneath my wings, on January 1st I decided to up the ante, to take it to the next level. It was time to go hard core! I chose to totally cut out sweets of any kind, and to take myself seriously, I promised $50 to charity for every infraction (I’m pleased to say all current donations are all voluntary and not chocolate imposed.)

Next, Jeff and I added the gym, first 4 days a week, and then 5.  This meant 5:15 am wakeup calls and an extra 1 hour of commute time.

Between “the plan”, the no sweets rule and 5 days a week at the gym, you would think I was doing pretty good.  I WISH! March 1st came and went and the scale had only moved a few measly pounds. My body was firming up so maybe the whole, “muscle weighs more than fat” ,thing was at work, but regardless, I was feeling disappointed and defeated.

Persisting Beyond Failure

That Monday, when I met with my food coach I was near tears.  “Am I ever going to get there?” I lamented.  A sadness came over me as my darkest most hidden fears revealed themselves “maybe you won’t Joelle, maybe you will always dream of the body you want and you will never actually arrive.”

This is not uncommon when we put it all on the line only to find out that our "all" doesn't cut it.  The doubt slips in and next thing you know we give up.  We resign ourselves to the life we have, instead of the one we dream of. 

It doesn’t have to be this way; even if you fall; even if what you thought was your best wasn’t good enough.  If the dream still lives in you then know that the mountain in front of you is climbable, you just may need some new equipment, an extra Sherpa or climbing lessons.

In my case I had a good coach, a supportive husband and years of witnessing myself and others persevering to achieve the improbable.  So I buckled down and asked myself, “What’s it really going to take?” and got back into action!

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

To the Next Level and BEYOND!

 Oh Boy HERE WE GO!

The next level I could see, was cutting out alcohol ( bye bye yummy red win,e SIGH.), and anything sweet, even the 0 calorie stuff (Added sweetener-even sugar free- trains the taste buds to crave sweetness, setting me up for trouble down the road.)

I found out my heart rate zones through an assessment at the gym and invested in a monitor.   I found out my resting metabolic rate ( which is ridiculously low which explains why I wasn’t seeing results when I was adding 100’s of calories of alcohol each week) and made some adjustments to my caloric intake.

This week I take the workout to 6 days a week, and I have no doubt that sometime in the next 3 months it will be time for a personal trainer.

Every day I learn more about my body, what makes it tick, how to shape it and what it will really take to get where I am going.

Persistence Pays!

I am happy to say that while I still have a way to go, my “next level” work is paying off. I’m into my skinny jeans and I am feeling stronger and healthier every day.  I am well on my way to being fabulous at 37 and gaining the habits and knowledge to be fabulous at 50, 70, 80 and beyond.

When I started this journey 5 months ago I had no idea I would be a regular at LifeTime Fitness, that I would be sipping Perrier at cocktail parties or that I would pass on birthday cake.

When I drew the line in the sand and started walking towards my goal, I had no idea it would be this challenging or that I would be making what to me, seem like extreme lifestyle choices. 

That’s the intriguing thing. When you make a commitment (I mean really MAKE A COMMITMENT) it is like getting onto a rollercoaster – you can’t jump ship when you are upside down in a loop just because it gets scary or you feel like throwing up. You ride it out to the end, knowing that it’s unlikely to kill you, and eventually you will arrive, wide eyed and grinning, shouting “What a ride!”

 I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday.  ~Author Unknown

Are you ready to go all the way?

Perhaps you can relate to my quest for health, or maybe you are growing your income, seeking your mate or following your professional dreams.  Whatever the task at hand, just remember, that while the road may be long and rocky, your perseverance and commitment can win the day.  And just when you think you have tried everything and failed, if you hold the vision, keep the faith, and stay open, there will be a next step, a new opening, and a chance for you to ask yourself  "Am I willing to go all the way?"

Follow your dreams…

Trust in your capacity to do what it takes…

Rise to the challenges (there are always challenges.)…

 And if you dare… jump on the ride and buckle yourself in. It's time to declare to the world… “I will go all the way!”

With Love,

Coach Joelle

Are you willing to draw a line in the sand and do whatever it takes to live the life you have imagined?  Share with us (below) what life dream you will commit to no matter what it takes. 

Do you have a story of perseverance in pursuit of your dream?  Inspire us with how you went all the way!

Hi guys,

If you have ever had a knowing that you have more to give, more to create, more adventures to embark upon… if you have ever had a wondering about what was possible beyond the routine of your day to day… if you have ever taken a quiet moment to ask “what’s next”, I want you to hear the story of Liz Harvey.

Who is Liz Harvey?  Well, she’s the proud mother of 3, an operating room nurse and the CEO of Island Windjammers http://www.islandwindjammers.com , the Caribbean’s newest tall-ship sailing company!

It you were to ask Liz two years ago if she had any aspirations to be a CEO, her answer would have been an emphatic “NO!” And if you would have asked her if she would ever be the CEO of a Cruise company, knowing Liz, she likely would have fallen down laughing.  She would have told you that, while she loved her work and had a great life, she also felt she had more room to contribute and she was ready for a new adventure even though she wasn’t sure what that adventure would be.

Well, as many of you know, the universe will not tolerate a void for long.  And those of you who know such things will find it no surprise that life delivered her adventure in the most fascinating and unexpected ways.

Liz’s journey from operating room nurse to Tall-Ship Cruise Company CEO is one that will delight and inspire anyone who is wondering what’s next in your own life adventure.  Enjoy this Life Makers MasterMind Interview as Liz shares her story of how a sailing vacation, a kind gesture and a “never say die” attitude landed her in the top spot at Island Windjammers.

Listen to the interview with Liz Harvey of Island Windjammers now!

T  o Listen:

 A) Double click on the link (above) and the file will open and play in window's media or your default audio player (because of it's size, please allow 5-10 minutes for the file to download.)

OR

B) Right click on the link and select "Save Target As." Pick a folder to save your audio into.  Once the program is saved to your hard drive you can upload it to your ipod or listen to it on your computer at your leisure.

Cheers!

   Joelle