Long time, no Newsletter!
5 interns, a new virtual assistant, two months of powerful life-making with the Make Your Lifers, a Dallas trip to fulfill my responsibilities as an Ewomen Network Success Coach and the siren call of the summer sun and let’s just say I have not been at my desk doing a lot of writing.
In fact, it has been such as effort to sit at my desk that with the first signs of spring I decided I needed a new office (check it out!) The move totally satisfies my craving to be in the sunlight and it has the most perfect lush green view. I even had a deer walk right through my office the other day! :-)
So many exciting developments I can hardly stand it! LaShaun one of my video interns has been making dreams reality by taking my visions of a sequence entitled “coaching lessons I learned from my cats” and has transformed it into an actual real live video lesson!! We are almost done so stay tuned and you can meet the fur family and learn a few things along the way!
Theresa (video intern number 2) is almost done with the animated intro for the “Make Your Life Moments” video pods (because every moment is a chance to make your life) and it is more beautiful than anything I could have imagined.
Jessica has created perfect logos for the 60 Days to Success Program and a new health and wellness version of the program that I am launching in September and Megan has been crafting an interactive slide presentation for my speaking engagements!
OH! And Megan has put a face on the Coach Joelle duck!! He is still being tweaked but I LOVE what she has come up with! Wait until you see this little dude!! I love him!!
Monica is helping me organize notes for the “MANifesto” the long awaited guide to finding love without compromise and she has once again brought her masterful writing and editing skills in collaborating with me on today’s article, Lessons From Goldilocks!
We just finished the spring session of the Make Your Life Program and for those of you who wanted to take the summer off but are excited for creating anew in the fall, there is a new session of the Make Your Life Program starting September 17th. Read more or register.
Yep, had some stuff going on, and it is only the end of July! Whew!
Also today I wanted to let you guys know of an upcoming no-cost Introduction to Passionate Powerful Living tele-seminar August 6 from 6-7:30 PM Eastern. If you have not attended one of these inspiring sessions I strongly encourage it. I am always stunned by the feedback I receive for committed people that come to the event with an open heart and a desire for something new. Read more or register.
And as a special treat today, at the end of the newsletter I have included a little note about a new book out by Guy Finley called The Essential Laws of Fearless Living. From what I have seen from Guy, he is a gentle soul with an important message and the book touches that place in the hearts and souls of its readers that I wish every person could experience. Enjoy reading more about it below.
Thank you for being on the journey with me. Embrace this summer of barbeques and trips to the beach. All too soon colored leaves, sweater time and cooler winds will be upon us.
The Make Your Life Program™
September 17th - November 12th
The Make Your Life Program™ is a one-of-a-kind tele-program which combines practical coaching skills, and professional support with creativity and play, allowing you to consciously create a life you love and experience the magic of a life lived on purpose.
READ MORE about the Make Your Life Program!
Experience the Magic of a Life Lived on Purpose
Lessons From Goldilocks: Find Your “Just Right”
We have all heard the childhood fairy tale “Goldilocks and the Three Bears,” but I bet when you were reading it to your two-year-old, you didn’t know it had an important life and leadership message hidden in its pages. In fact, Goldilocks has a few lessons to teach us about finding the perfect fit—whether it is in beds, porridge, finding our authentic leadership style or just asking our partner to take out the garbage.
Let me explain…
The Goldilocks Dillemma
What I like to call “The Goldilocks Dilemma” usually starts out with a nice, well-meaning person who is afraid of being too harsh— or becoming a so-called “jerk.” As a result, this person:
- doesn’t assert themself
- doesn’t express when something is not working for them
- feels like people walk all over them
- feels like people don't respect them
In other words…they are “too soft.”
(Sound familiar? Anyone…. Anyone…?)
After a while, this well-meaning person gets so fed up because no one respects them and they can never get what they need from people and as a result they lash out, finally saying what they have been wanting to say for so long—except now it comes from a place of frustration, upset and sometimes even aggression. In the end, our well-meaning friend winds up sounding like the “jerk” they had been trying so hard to avoid. They find themselves acting and speaking from this “too hard” place, which is quickly followed by guilt and discomfort because they have acted in a way that is just not them. They vow never to allow themselves to slip again, heading back to their sweet, helpless ways, and so the cycle continues.
Does this sound like you?
- Do you feel like people walk all over you or don't respect you?
- Do you ever find yourself complaining that people don't give you what you need?
- Do you feel that the only way to get something done is to get angry, raise your voice, or guilt someone into doing it?
- Does everything feel too hard or too soft and you yearn to find a place where you can feel comfortable just being yourself -that feeling of “just right”?
Well then you may just have encountered “The Goldilocks Dilemma!”
Finding Your “Just Right”
If our little fairytale sounds more like a personal horror story, do not fear, my friends. It IS possible for you to find your “just right”!
The key to resolving this cycle of suppression and frustration is you need to start expressing yourself (insert Madonna Soundtrack here ;-)). It takes courage to speak your truth and ask for what you need from people, but it is the only way to begin to break the too hot/too cold cycle.
The foundation of being able to avoid being a victim without losing your cool is to find a balanced place from which to have your conversations and make your requests. This balanced place is calm, and centered and is rooted in confidence. It is a place where you can ask for things while honoring others AND yourself. And if you were to watch the whole thing as a fly on the wall or you saw the whole situation on video, you would be proud of how you acted.
(Can you imagine it?)
Once you're in this place, with courage and intention, you can learn how to respectfully speak your truth and not back down even when things feel uncomfortable. From this place you can clearly ask for what you need, calmly follow up with people when they don't follow through, and say what needs to be said even when it’s unpopular.
3 simple steps to finding your “just right”:
Step 1: Get clear on what you want to accomplish: Whether it is coaching an employee to show up on time, asking the grocery store to give you a discount, having a friend stop giving you their opinions on your love life or getting your child to start picking up their clothes, being willing to clearly acknowledge what you want to yourself is required before you can start expressing it to others.
Step 2: Ask yourself: “What would ‘just right’ look like?” Or put another way, If you could represent yourself any way in this situation, what way would that be? By setting a clear vision for your behavior in this situation and how you would like to handle it, you will have a guideline to stop you from slipping into the roles of wimp or oppressor.
Step 3: Get out there and Speak! Once you are clear on what you want and how you want to represent yourself all that is left to do is to act on it. Act and speak consistently, follow up without fail, and ask for what you want, even when you are challenged, even when you are tempted to go hide in a closet.
That is your task, to take action to make things happen as the person you want to be. Speak and act from your “Just Right” place and leave your days of powerlessness (too soft) and aggression (too hard) behind.
And if the task seems daunting at first?
Do not fear! Your "just right" is your authentic self dying to express itself. Just start speaking, stay calm and trust that your "just right" will be just right. Watch as doors open, mountains move and the world changes right before your eyes.
Rock on, Goldilocks!
ATTENTION GOLDILOCKS!: "Just right" is waiting for you this fall in the Make Your Life Program starting September 17th Read More.
Recent Coach Joelle Blog posts include:
Everything's Coming Up Roses: Lots and lots of them
What I Think About the Youth of America
Coach Joelle Wine-ing about Ohio
Sailors Seeking Ship
Guy Finley's The Essential Laws of Fearless Living!
As promised, here is the information about Guy Finley's new book and a pretty cool personal development opportunity.
For Today and tomorrow Guy Finley has gathered together over
40 leading authors and experts, to show you new ways to lift
your life to new heights -- including the one great
secret to being wise, fearless, and free.
You can go here now to find out what's going on:
Guy has written an earth-shaking new book that was just
simultaneously released in 142 countries. It's called
The Essential Laws of Fearless Living. Guy has collaborated with
over 40 other authors and experts who are joining in to help spread the word...
It took this book 12 short hours after its initial release to become the #1 bestselling title on Amazon.com? It's good stuff!
If you're interested in solving the great inner-mysteries of
our time -- and enjoying more success, more love, and less
stress in the process -- this is your chance to learn how, and get over 50 free bonus gifts to boot. The bonuses alone will keep you growing for years and the book stands on its own.
Just go here now for all the details. Nothing to lose, and literally everything to gain.
All best wishes for a fearless life,
Make your life a work of art! Find yourself, take it to the next level, create a whole new life!
Contact Joelle via email or at 216-320-9298.
”Working with Joelle has really given me the tools to own my power, to trust my intuition and to follow my dreams no matter what.”
Get more Joy in your job! Increase productivity, earn more and have more fun at work!
Contact Joelle to explore the possibilities. via email or at 216-320-9298.
“This was truly a life changing event for me both personally and professionally.”
-Gary B. Feldman
Vice President of Sales and
Delta Dental of Arizona
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Phone: 216 320 9298